State of the family address

My, my blogger friends...so much to update you on and my apologies for my delay in keeping you all up to speed.  Toby and I are rocking along and are thrilled about the path God has put us on.  Our lives are full. 

Let's take it back a few...years...When we moved back to Alabama from Tennessee, we knew that God had called Toby to go back to school to earn his theology degree and that He wanted us to "work in a church."  That was about all the guidance we were given at the time, so we worked at it as best we could.  After four or five months, God led us to South Coast Church...the perfect family of believers for our little family.  The relationships, encouragement and purpose we have found there are incredible and could only be ordained by sweet Abba's plan.  When we first moved back to Mobile we were looking for a pastor job, looking for someone to give us authority.  After all, God did say He wanted us to work in a church, so we did everything in our power to make that happen...including cold calling random churches on a Google search asking for a job.  While we did get some interesting responses, there was nothing down that road but closed doors.  Once we surrendered that our plan wasn't getting us anywhere, a new verse became our focus:

"For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, and he who humbles himself will be exalted."  Luke 14:11

So, when we landed at South Coast we decided to do it God's way...novel idea.  We decided not to pursue a "job" or even a position of influence, but to sit back and let God open doors for us.  The church was meeting in an elementary school gym at the time and we started helping wherever we could.  We showed up for set up on Saturday nights and cleaned toilets, set out chairs, and scraped goo off the gym floor.  After a while, our pastor John asked Toby if he would help collect the offering.  Later they asked me to man the first time visitor table, then they asked Toby to help count the offering and eventually to present the welcome chat before the sermon.  We never once asked for authority, but actively chose to take the position of servant.  We kept our eyes open for any opportunity to help...to take the trash out, to tear down the service on Sunday afternoons, to help with the kids during meetings.  And wouldn't you know, God's way works.  Over time, Toby and I were asked to take on more and more responsibility and we found such great purpose and thrill in being able to serve in that way.  Eventually, we were asked to coordinate the small groups for the church and we have LOVED it.  We love getting to know people, calling people into leadership and seeing them stretch themselves beyond what they think they are capable of.  We love watching people's lives change.  We have seen people exposed to the truth of who God is, some for the first time, have their entire perspective on life shift, and then immediately bring their friends and family to hear the good news.  We have been so honored to serve the Lord and the family of South Coast Church.

Most recently we have been given even greater assignments.  In the fall of 2012 our pastors, and dear friends, came to have dinner with us one night.  We had no idea that would change it all for us.  Before they left for the evening, we had been prompted with the next step on our journey.  Over the following months, Toby accepted the position of Executive Pastor and was ordained by the church, and I began serving as the church accountant.  Keep in mind that Toby is also still working a full time job as an engineer, but our paths and direction were made so clear at this crossroad.  God had used nearly 10 years of education, training and experience to prepare us for this next step.  Toby has received countless hours of training and experience in running large organizations, developing and growing teams, teaching leadership skills, and motivating others...all necessary skills for an executive pastor.  I was a CPA before I chose to stay home when Haley was born.  Now all of the skills I learned in bookkeeping, auditing, and management are coming into play for His Kingdom.

We are thrilled to work together for the advancement of the Kingdom of God and are so humbled and honored to walk the path that God has spent years preparing for us.  And just so you know, Toby has no plans to leave his engineering job in the near future and only lacks his thesis on his Master's Degree.  We are trusting God to provide all that we need (including time management) and are following His guidance one day at a time.

So what about the kids?  Our sweet babies, Haley (4) and Jake (1) have always been home with me.  It is a gift I will treasure for all of my days.  In this season where I am easing back into the "working" world, Abba has been so, so good to all of us.  My work schedule is incredibly flexible, and I am free to work whenever I can.  God has provided the world's greatest nanny to love on my kids at home two days a week.  She adores them, they adore her, they play outside, and go for walks.  She even does some laundry and dishes.  She is a God-send...literally!  This season has been a good transition for the summer when they will both attend a Moms Day Out program three days a week.  Haley is thrilled, and I know they will do great.  Haley starts big kid school in August.  I had to lay down my homeschool world and surrender that God knows me and my family better than I do, and He has led us to the most amazing school.  There is still no news to report on the adoption, but thank you to all of you who have prayed and asked about it.

So that's the latest and greatest on our family and for now, here's a little peak into our world...


The Locklar Family | A Day In The Life from Hampton Road Studios on Vimeo.

Thank you to Matt and Ashley Hampton at Hampton Road Studios for capturing this season of our lives so beautifully.  This video will be a treasure to me forever!

We're over the first hump

We have had so many people ask about how the adoption process is coming, so I wanted to drop a quick note to keep everyone in the loop.  A few weeks ago we turned in our mountain of paperwork.  All of it was reasonable, it was just a lot of stuff to collect...certified copies of our birth certificates, marriage certificates and deed on our house, reference letters from friends and family, proof of employment and insurance, letters from our bank confirming our financial assertions, financial records, autobiographies, medical exams, etc etc etc.  So anyway, we finally got through all of that and are on to the next phase.

We met with our social worker last night and were so encouraged by everything she had to share.  We had some concerns regarding the financial "risks" we are undertaking as spelled out in the contract we have to sign with the agency, but she was a great comfort.  She assured us that they do a lot of screening with the birthmothers on the front end, and statistically, once we are matched with a birthmother the chances of everything working out are really good...at least that is this agency's experience.  She also walked us through the next few steps in more detail.  We will begin the home study process this Sunday and will conclude it after the July 4th holiday.  The home study consists of two visits from our social worker to our home.  She will evaluate how we relate to and "manage" our children, the safety and cleanliness of our home, and we will discuss in more detail our parenting styles, childhoods, and motivations and expectations regarding the adoption.  The home study process is a standard event that is required by the state to be considered a suitable adoptive parent, regardless of where the adopted child comes from. 


The home study should be complete around the middle of July at which point we will begin the education phase.  We will have several conferences with a member of our agency who will provide us with information regarding the specific circumstances and needs of adopted children.  This is one of the reasons that we are so happy to be working with this agency, Children of the World.  This is not just business to them.  They are dealing with people's lives and they take very seriously the opportunity they have to minister to us, the birthmother, and the adopted child. 

At this point, we will be ready to receive our son and will begin the waiting process.  There are several ways to "find" our son, many of which we will investigate further when that time comes.  Once we are matched with a birthmother through a mutual selection process, the majority of our expenses will come due.  The birthmother's individual situation will determine how much financial help she needs from us regarding her basic needs as well as assistance from the agency.  The more help she needs, the more it will cost us.  The agency estimates a maximum expense of around $18,000.  To be honest, we do not have $18,000 sitting in our bank accounts today.  All we know is that God told us to start this process several months ago.  He told me specifically then that He will provide what we need, when we need it, to trust Him and begin the process...even before the money is sitting in the bank.  So here we are.  We have a saved a good bit that will get us started and I have started Bezi's Creations in an effort to raise some of the funds, but we are taking one step at a time...confident that He will make good on His promise, just like He always does! 

On the Bezi's front, I am getting ready to open a shop on Etsy in the next week or so.  I am so excited about all that God has shown me through this business and I hope you will take a minute to check it out.  The FaceBook page will stay up to keep you posted on our adoption progress, to display new products, and to offer promotions. 

Thank you so much to all of you that have been so encouraging.  Please continue to pray for us, our son, and his birthmother.  Please pray for God's guidance as we all make decisions and for all things to play out in His perfect timing.  As always, we are humbled and honored to be used in expanding His Kingdom and spreading His love.

A new normal

We've been in our new house for two months now and many people have asked us if we're settled yet.  I guess the answer is yes and no.  Nearly all of our boxes are unpacked and we are functioning "normally" but there is still much to be done.  For example, the bonus room is home to many of Haley's toys.  We've never had a bonus room before and therefore, we have no bonus room furniture...thus Haley's toys are scattered all over the floor with no place to be put away.  By the way, that's about to drive me nuts, so we'll be getting some bookshelves, at least, in the near future.

Toby is itching to hang pictures on every wall of the house.  Somehow I can't get him to realize that it's not quite that simple.  While I agree that having our art or photos on the walls would do wonders in making our space feel more homey, there are several steps ahead of hanging pictures.  For instance, our bedroom has been burgundy and gold for the eight years we've been married, and I'm ready for something different.  Which means a new bedspread and curtains.  Also our bedroom here is so much larger, so we are saving up for additional furniture like a seating area...all of which must be established before said pictures can be hung.

So anyway, in answer to your question about "are we settled yet?"...we're getting there.  Toby and I both still have days where we just walk around and laugh at our house.  It feels like we're living in somebody else's home, or at least some fancy hotel.  Not a day goes by that we don't look around in awe and amazement of the gift God has given us in this home. 

Another new aspect of "normal" is the addition of MiMi and Pop just 13 houses down.  Yes, that's right.  After they had their house on the market, on and off, for three years, my Jesus finally sold their house (in His timing) and moved them to my neighborhood!  I can see their front door from my driveway...it's amazing!  They've taken the kids while I do housework, I've dropped the littles off so I can browse the grocery store isles in peace, and we've eaten many meals at their table.  Having never lived in such close proximity to family, this is taking some time to get used to...I don't have to do everything on my own all the time!  I have help!  This is such a blessing and I'm loving every minute of it!

I would say that my biggest adjustment since the move has been managing my time.  As any stay at home mom of little ones will tell you, raising, feeding, educating, and caring for the little guys is a full time job that demands lots of attention.  Throw the household chores like laundry, shopping, cooking, cleaning, and bill paying on top and you've got your hands full.  So I've been juggling all of that for three years, but now I've got this big house to furnish also.  Unfortunately, my littles are not too crazy about running errands all over town in search of rugs, lamps and sofas...it's just not their thing.  So I had a bit of a break down a few weeks ago as I explained to Toby that I felt like I was treading water, just trying to keep things moving, even as the laundry was about to eat me alive.   As always, our God is so practical and He is helping me to find my balance.  I have several new goals.  Two of which are to make my kids belly laugh every day and to accomplish one thing each week toward the furnishing of the house.  So far, so good.  Decorating this house will be a marathon, but the dreaming, planning and bringing it to life is the fun part.  I'm thrilled to be able to turn this house into our home, even if it does take years to do it.

On my most overwhelming day a few weeks ago, I landed on a wonderful phone call from a friend, Tracy.  She has five teenagers, so I know that she knows exactly what I'm talking about.  She offered such wonderful advice, "You know, you've got to cut yourself some slack.  Once I feel like I've got my normal under control and we get in a rhythm, somebody goes and changes all the rules."  Every season and every stage will have it's own set of challenges and "normals," so I guess now is as good of a time as any to start rolling with the punches.

It's a good thing too because I know we've got another new normal just around the corner...

A hard lesson in grace

A hard day...a hard lesson...a good reminder...

This afternoon the kids and I had to leave the house for a few hours, so we took a drive. (More details on that to come later.) After a good hour and we were still not able to return home, sweet Jake was over the car seat. Haley had a movie going, so she was content as could be, but not knowing how long we'd be I knew Jake had to get out of the car. It was a little after 5:00, so I thought we'd grab an early dinner.

Now, I never attempt to eat in a restaurant alone with two children. Any mom with small children knows that is just asking for trouble, but when you're desperate you do what you have to do. So we pulled into a local chicken finger joint. I hauled myself, my 6 month old in carrier, the diaper bag and 3 year old across the parking lot, into the small restaurant, and to an empty table. In a moment of genius I decided to put Jake in a high chair. He's recently mastered sitting up and I figured he'd be happier there than in his car seat...and a happy baby makes for a happy dinner, for everyone.


It turns out that Jake, indeed, liked the high chair. In fact, he liked it so much that he was ecstatic in expressing his excitement...in loud, shrill screams. This squeal is a new skill, so he was thrilled to practice it...over and over. I, on the other hand, was mortified. I do not want to be that mom with out of control kids, disrupting everybody else's meal. But what am I to do? I did everything I could think of...shoved snacks in his mouth, jingled toys in front of his face, even pulled up a cartoon on You Tube on my phone. Oh, he was happy with all my efforts...too happy. I patted his mouth as he screamed in an effort to quiet him, but that just encouraged him on. For once, Haley was sitting in her seat, eating away and being incredibly well behaved.

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a young couple sitting next to us watching Jake. I looked over and apologized, but she sweetly laughed and started playing with him. Whew. I continue shoveling in an effort to get us out of there as quickly as possible when an older gentlemen appeared at my side. When I looked up at him he started talking to Jake, "How does such a loud noise come out of such a small body? You are so cute..." he continued and chatted with Haley before saying goodbye.

A few minutes later another gentlemen came to our table. I looked up to him, anticipating another nice compliment about my cute kids. "Will you please do a better job to keep him under control? That noise is really painful." I'm not sure if I replied. I brought my eyes down and they met those of the young woman next to me. I think she was as shocked as I was. I didn't know what to do. Haley and I still had a considerable amount of dinner to finish. I considered going to sit at a table outside, but it was getting cold and I didn't have jackets for the kids. So I shoveled faster and pushed Haley to eat quickly, not wanting to be a bother to anyone else and knowing that eyes were peering at me. After I finished a few more bites, I sacrificed the rest of my salad, asked for a to-go container, boxed up the rest of Haley's food, scrounged to pack up our belongings and loaded my family up to leave. As we walked away from our table, the gentlemen had his back to us, but I was able to make eye contact with his wife. I mouthed, "I'm sorry." She nodded with a "you should be" look on her face and then returned her attention to her food. In the parking lot I did my best to explain the situation to Haley, but she still didn't understand why someone was rude ("mean," in her words) and that we had to leave before we were finished.

Sweet Toby called my cell phone as I pulled out of the parking lot. It just so happened that he was on his way to class and we passed at the red light in front of the restaurant. He had good news, but I couldn't concentrate on it, much less celebrate it. When I told him what had happened at the restaurant, he quickly asked for the man's description. Not wanting to cause a scene and fearful that maybe I just overreacted or was being too sensitive, I hesitated. He was insistent, I described the man, and he said, "I've gotta go" ...click.

About fifteen minutes later my phone rang again. "That man wanted to apologize and says that he didn't mean to upset you." Still hurt, I didn't care, but was touched that Toby took interest in my pain. Here's Toby's side of the story...

As soon as he walked in, he looked around and the young couple that had been sweet to me knew exactly who he was. They whispered to each other and put their heads down. Toby declined an invitation from a friend to join his table and responded, "Thanks man, but I'm not here for food." He found the offender and his wife and helped himself to seat at their table. He began, "First of all, I am very sorry if my family disrupted your evening." At this, the man put the pieces together and started to stutter. Toby is no small fry. He continued, "However, that was my family and I don't appreciate the way you spoke to my wife. She left here very upset and there was no reason for it." The man replied, "Look, I didn't mean to upset her. (His wife added her agreement.) I've had a hard day and a headache..." The man wore a uniform for a local plant...a similar work environment to Toby's job. My sweet husband answered, "I know what kind of job you do, sir, and I understand that days can be tough, but my wife has had a challenging day as well." "Yes, we've raised children and grandchildren." "Good, then you know that sometimes you can't do much to control a six month old. She was doing her best to deal with two kids on her own and she rushed her own dinner so she wouldn't disrupt others. Next time, maybe you could offer to help a mom who's struggling instead of being critical."

As Toby left the restaurant he ran into the young couple in the parking lot. They cheered him on. In a sigh of relief, Toby said, "Man, if I didn't love Jesus, I'd of said a whole lot more." The young guy jumped in, "Hey, I love Jesus and I'd of let him have it!"

I am by no means looking for pity or attempting to make myself a victim. I have no doubt that my baby was a distraction and unpleasant presence for most everyone else in that restaurant. For that, I apologize. But I will always remember this evening as a reminder to show grace to others...even when they're unpleasant. You never know what someone else is going through.

Jesus, when I find myself annoyed by someone else, please help me to be a blessing and not hurtful. Help me to remember how powerful my words are...they can build up or they can easily tear down. Show me how to extend your love, even when it's difficult.

Toby, you will never know what your actions tonight did for my soul. You fought for my honor. You are my hero and I love you all the more!

I am in love

So first, many apologies for my near six month absence, but I can tell you that God is still good and I have lots to share with you.

We have been enjoying our little man and our new family dynamic of four. I must admit, the adjustment into a mom of two little ones took longer than I expected. Now that Jake is pushing 6 months, I think we've finally found our rhythm.


My little man has been such a sweet gift. I am blown a way, and a bit sad, that so many milestones have already come and gone. Jake has the sweetest spirit. He is content with nearly any situation and rarely fusses. He is finally entertaining the idea of food and today his first tooth broke the surface. He's working hard on sitting up and squirming and rolling desperately across the floor. It won't be long before he's off and running. He adores his big sister and could watch her endless singing and dancing for hours. The bond they share amazes me...it started before he was even born. He would often shift in the womb at the sound of Haley entering the room. I know their bond will always be tight. Before he arrived, I didn't know what it would be like to share my love, attention and affections between two little ones. I have been amazed in these last six months that I haven't had to split my love at all, Jake simply opened a new corner of my heart...a corner reserved just for him. I had forgotten how easy it is to fall hopelessly in love with such a small, helpless little person. I am honored to be his mommy and am loving our days of watching him grow and learn.

One of my prayers for Haley before Jake was born was for her to be excited about her little brother and to not be jealous of him. So far, so good. She is enamored with her "baby." She loves to help with him, entertain him and teach him how to play with his toys. She has never expressed any envy or ill will against him. From the day he entered our lives, she has been nothing but excited about him. She has taken on her new role of big sister like a pro, and I couldn't have asked for anything more. Like the rest of us, she is anxious to teach him about life, although I'm sure her perspective will be special indeed.

My sweet Toby has been such a rock...my hero. I am thrilled for him to have a son, and as a bonus Jake is Toby's little clone. When sitting in his daddy's lap, the resemblance is uncanny. But when you look at Toby's baby pictures, you can barely tell them apart. Toby is so proud of his son, and so helpful in every way. There is nothing I love more than watching my sweet babies adore their daddy. I am truly one blessed woman. The gifts God has given me in these three people are beyond what I ever imagined.

Stick with me over the next few days as I hope to update you on the last six months. I pray you each had a wonderful Christmas celebration and have been able to enjoy priceless family time throughout this holiday season.

Are you invisible?

A friend shared this clip with our MOPS groups several months ago, and it touched my heart deeply. I've held on to it until the right time to share it with you and I think today is a great day...on the heels of celebrating all that our moms and wives do for our families.

Often we women do so much for our families that seems to go unnoticed...cooking, cleaning, endless loads of laundry, planning for company, packing snacks for a day out with the family...there are so many things that a mom has to do, many of them never receiving recognition. In addition to the chores of a homemaker, a Christian mom has the added duty of raising her children in a way that leads them to the Lord...soothing their fears, teaching them to take their worries to Jesus, not making a horrible face when they try a new look, and repeatedly speaking encouragement when frustration is really what lies on your tongue. It's not the husband's fault that he doesn't comment and reward each sacrifice and day of seamless planning. First of all, he's a man and he's often not going to perceive needs as we do. That's just how we're wired. Also, many of these actions take place in secret...planning things out in our minds as we run errands or choosing our words carefully in the quiet places of our heart. But above all this, these sacrifices and acts of love and service never go unnoticed by the One who matters most. Abba sees it all!

This doesn't just apply to women either. Often men feel like their actions are often overlooked...extra time and effort expended at work, taking the trash out at home, putting aside "down time" to play with the kids. As a wife and mother, I am guilty of not always acknowledging Toby's acts of service and love, even if I do notice them. I often treat them as expected duties and don't offer the gratitude he deserves.

Please take a minute to watch this video and be encouraged. Let's all try to do a better job of verbalizing our appreciation, but in the mean time, know that your actions are never passed by and never made little of by the One who sees them all.

The Invisible Woman - courtesy of You Tube

Family update

I don't have anything earth shattering to share today, but I did want to let you know of some happenings with our family these days.

Toby earned an A in both of his classes last semester. While they weren't hugely academically challenging, they were a good warm up to get him back in the swing of school. This semester he will take his first master's class, Historical Theology, and an online Greek class from New Orleans Seminary. He is cramming, as we speak, for the GRE that he is scheduled to take tomorrow morning. In an ideal world, he would have taken this before being accepted into the Master's program, but the university graciously allows for a student to take up to two graduate courses before the scores are required. I am excited to have this item off of our to do list. I have no doubt that he will do beautifully, but it's been a rough trip back to high school grammar and math. Your prayers tomorrow morning would be much appreciated!

Also tomorrow morning we will begin potty training (again) with Haley. We gave it a go in August when we first moved to Mobile, but the move and potty training proved to be too much for her little world, so we gave up and headed back to diapers. I know this sounds silly, but I am petrified of this process! I know that she is ready since she will squat in the living room and announce, "I tee tee!" but still I have visions of her not getting it, peeing all over my house and forcing us to be home-bound for weeks on end. Ok, I know it's ridiculous, but that's where I am. Over the last few days, God has been speaking to me about being flexible and I think this has to fall into that category. I will have to accept that should my "three day potty training, straight-to-panties Plan A" fail, the world will not come to a screeching halt if she lives in pull-ups for a few weeks...right? Besides, I've been looking around at preschoolers for the past week and keep thinking, "He's not in diapers. This has been done before...it can be done!" I'm sure this is only one of many parenting hurdles that will intimidate me. Wish us luck!

Today begins the second trimester in expecting our second bundle of joy! We went in for a check up this afternoon and were thrilled to hear the heartbeat...a steady 160 beats per minute. It took our doctor a few minutes (literally) to find the heartbeat (causing a momentary panic attack for Toby and me), but eventually she found the little booger. She asked if I had felt him move yet because "this kid is all over the place!" That was just the question I needed to hear to convince me that those tiny flutters I've been feeling were indeed our little one. They are faint, but definitely there and now that I know it's not just my imagination, I'm noticing them a little more frequently. We will go back in four weeks for another check up and the all exciting anatomy scan where we will get to find out the sex! If you haven't already figured it out...I'm a planner...I MUST know the sex!

I love to read up on what's happening with this baby's development and am continuously amazed at God's incredible design. I didn't tell those little cells to do anything and yet they each knew exactly what to do! Some became a heart and others formed into lungs and still others knew that they were destined to become bones...all on their own. If this baby is a girl, she already has 2 million eggs, just waiting for her babies...that blows my mind! The most complex system known to man and it formed itself without anybody's help or guidance! And now, this 3" little person is nearly just like you and me. It can blink, move it's arms and legs, and squirm around. I am in awe of this amazing creation and humbled that God has again entrusted such a beautiful gift to our care. We have about six months to go until we get to meet this wonderful child...I can't wait to see that beautiful face!

Thank you for your prayers and words of encouragement as we move along on this journey. We'll keep you posted...

Christmas memories

I love to have a visual of the people and places I read about. Ok, Toby calls me nosy, but either way I realize that I haven't shared many family pictures with you...so late Merry Christmas! I hope you enjoy a glimpse into our Christmas holiday. Thanks for following me this past year and I'm looking forward to many great things in 2011!

Making Christmas cookies at Granny's house.


Chef Haley working on cookie masterpieces.


Christmas cookies.
The kids put forth a fair effort, but wimped out pretty quickly. Aunt Susan and I finished off the rest.


Our visit with Santa wasn't as successful as I'd hoped. Haley was fine to watch him from a distance, but wasn't too excited to sit with him. (Go figure...not sure I'd want to sit on some stranger's lap either.) After getting a candy cane early and sitting with Mommy, we finally got a calm picture with Santa. Had I known I would be in the shot, I wouldn't have worn hot pink...lesson learned.
MiMi made Haley's Christmas dress with the help of Granny and Aunt Susan. One of my goals for 2011 is to learn to sew with confidence.


Haley had a Toy Story Christmas. Here she is with Buzz, Woody, Jessie, and Bullseye tucked under her Buzz and Woody blanket, all piled inside her blow up Toy Story tent. It's so fun to watch her imagination as she makes new "friends".


Haley playing in the backyard. One of my new favorite pictures of her.


Mommy and Haley at the Bellingrath Gardens Christmas in Lights.


Me and my love, Toby, enjoying the lights.


Toby and Carey


Finally, a decent family picture...aka Haley is smiling in the direction of the camera, the rest of us are irrelevant.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

A day redeemed

Last week we had a little scare with the baby. It turned out to not be a very big deal, but my doctor still wanted me to "stay off my feet" through the rest of the weekend. Seeing as how it's not very often that I am ordered to lounge on the sofa for four days straight, I did my best to be obedient.

Have you ever heard the saying, "lazy breeds lazy"? The idea is that the more you sit around, the less energy you have, so the more you sit around and so begins a vicious cycle. Well, four days of Disney movie watching was enough to set that cycle into motion. By Monday I was antsy to get moving again, but utterly crashed by lunchtime. I spent the rest of the day either dozing on the sofa again, or watching Haley play throughout the house...from the sofa. By the time this morning came around, I wanted to do nothing but sit and stare into space. The mounting to do list was daunting...laundry, clean the overflowing kitchen, run errands, bathe the dog, and not to mention the seemingly endless items in preparation for Christmas. As is my bad habit, when I get overwhelmed by my to do list, I choose to do nothing. I often find a mind numbing movie and stare into space instead of making even a little progress on my chores. It's a terrible habit, but that's where I found myself this morning.

After allowing Haley to watch videos in our bed for nearly an hour while I snoozed in and out of consciousness, I decided it was time to start moving. I mindlessly prepared breakfast and told Jesus, "I'm going to need You to get me through this day...both Your strength and Your patience." Before I knew what had happened, breakfast was finished and I had cleaned the entire kitchen. I looked around, amazed at this feat and thought back to my prayer, just thirty minutes earlier...it was happening. I also got the grand idea (aka Jesus told me) to move my errands to after nap time instead of before so we wouldn't be so rushed..."brilliant", I thought. The morning continued and I did two loads of laundry and sorted through nearly a week's worth of mail. While Haley was napping I even stole away an hour with my Beloved and read the next few chapters of Judges. That was a great lifter of my soul. After nap time, Haley and I ran errands, including grocery shopping, prepared a healthy supper, bathed the toddler and had her in bed almost on time. Then I cleaned the kitchen (again), wrote the Christmas letter I've been postponing for weeks, and even have enough energy to write to you!

Wow! Today is the best I've felt in a week, and I know it's because Jesus poured His supernatural strength on my tired bones and allowed me the resolve and patience to chip away a few items on my ever growing to do list! Thank you Jesus for redeeming my day! For allowing me to be productive, to invest time in my daughter and to see Your handiwork...and for my day not to be stolen away by staring aimlessly into space, as was my desire when my eyes opened this morning. You are so good, and so concerned about my pitiful woes. It never ceases to amaze me.

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I know some of you are concerned about me "doing too much" as my pregnancy continues, but please trust that I know my own body. The fatigue that has come with this first trimester caught me offguard...I had forgotten the extent of it, but I do know when I need to sit and rest. Like I said, it's not very often in life that we have such a wonderful excuse to rest...I don't plan on wasting it! You should also know that Toby has been so wonderful over the last few weeks. He has been helpful around the house and with Haley, despite his mounting schoolwork. He even took Haley to Wal-Mart (with coupons in hand) one day last week so that I could rest and we would still have the necessary groceries to make it through the weekend. He makes me feel so special. Rest assured, as soon as my head hits the pillow tonight, I'll be out like a light! On that note...I'm pooped. Good night, all.

A day of thanksgiving

I am thankful that our country takes one day a year to focus on the endless blessings that abound here. I have been so encouraged to see nearly every Facebook status reflect a thankful heart this morning. All too often we (myself included) get so caught up in the craziness of life that we bypass all we have to be thankful for.

This year, I am thankful for a deeper relationship with my Jesus. He has pursued me and taken me to new places, and I know that I've only tasted the blessings He has prepared for those who love Him.

I am thankful for my precious Toby. Twelve years ago yesterday, November 24, Toby asked me to his house to play pool. We were juniors in high school and I was beside myself with excitement. The last twelve years have been a blast. We have grown up together and learned about life together. I have watched our jealous God turn an all-American teenage boy into a man after His own heart. It's been an incredible ride.

I am thankful for my beautiful Haley. After joining the mommy world, I learned just how many things can go wrong during pregnancy. The fact that Haley developed perfectly through pregnancy and has never been sick, to speak of, is something I will always treasure. She is growing and learning every day and each day she steals a little more of my heart...and to think, I didn't know there was more of me to give.

I am thankful for an abundance of family that loves us dearly. As an adult I have met others with family strains and distance. This thought is heart breaking. I am thankful that every branch of our family is peaceable...at least in corporate gatherings. :) Throughout the year and especially during the holidays, doors are always open and loved ones are only a phone call away. Although we are spread around the south and we don't see our family as often as we'd like, I will always be thankful for our loved ones.

I am thankful for the many friends God has put in our lives. In our six years of marriage, God has blessed us with friends who love us and love Him, friends who have challenged us to become better people and have encouraged us in our walk with Him. While our days in our new Mobile home have been fairly lonely, we have faith that He will again provide a new group of great friends.

I am thankful for our country. I will never understand the great sacrifice that so many families have made in order to make and keep our country the great place that it is. The wealth and financial bounty that floods this country is abundant. I am thankful for having everything I could possibly need. Never do I worry where my next meal will come from or whether or not I will be able to take a hot shower or turn on the lights...all things that are expected here, but great luxuries in many parts of our world.

I am thankful for all of you. While this is not something I would have ever started on my own (Jesus told me to do this) this blog has been a fun journey so far. I have been so blessed and encouraged to hear how our stories have touched you. This blog has seen hits from nearly every continent and I am constantly blown away that God is using our struggles and our triumphs for good in this world. Please feel free to share our stories and I always love to hear yours.

Let us make a daily habit of taking stock of the blessings that surround us and never take a single one for granted. Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!

Shrimpfest

One of my favorite things to do is check out local festivals. I love being outside, I love seeing the local art and creativity, and most importantly I love the food! Not long after we moved back to Mobile, I saw a billboard for Shrimpfest, so Toby and I planned a mini vacation to Gulf Shores to check it out. Yesterday afternoon we left Haley with my sister and headed south...

Carey and Toby at the beach, enjoying Shrimpfest.

We got there just in time to join the crowds for dinner, but of course we had to make a complete loop to take in our options before making any decisions. The offerings were ridiculous...crab cakes, fish, scallops, clams, conch, lobster...anything you could want on a stick - shrimp on a stick, chicken on a stick, gator on a stick...and to steal a line from Bubba, "fried shrimp, grilled shrimp, shrimp creole, popcorn shrimp, coconut shrimp, shrimp scampi" and the list goes on. There were also plenty of land lover options including pizza, hamburgers and gyros, but why would you go for that at Shrimpfest? I even tried the "2009 Best of the Fest" winner, the Creole Pistol...crab, crawfish, shrimp and cheese stuffed into a roll and fried...it was interesting, good bread, but too much cheese and not enough seafood for my taste. I guess you get the point...I like to eat! The Shrimpfest is still going on tomorrow (Sun, Oct 10) for any of you locals that haven't had a chance to check it out yet.

Nothing like a funnel cake and Wild Bill's root beer for breakfast!

My second favorite thing about local festivals is the art. I am always amazed at people's creativity. We saw tons of paintings, mostly beach scenes, but all were beautiful. There was one booth that had taken beer and wine bottles, melted them down into various objects like bowls and wind chimes...interesting and creative. Another booth boasted jewelry made out of glass bottles and another artist had made portraits on canvas out of beer bottle tops. Are we seeing a theme here? Despite the alcohol theme of several of my favorite vendors, the festival was very family friendly. There was a great kids play area and tons of children's clothing booths.

Last night we met a great mom and daughter duo selling classic handmade children's clothing. Their shop is called Sarah's Kids and they were the sweetest ladies. Their clothing was beautiful, simple, well made and reasonably priced. I'm not a frou frou kind of girl and therefore rarely dress my daughter in the traditional southern frocks. (For those of you outside the south, little girls here are expected to sport lace, smockings and tights on special occasions...all of which require delicate care and formal settings...neither are things that interest me.) Anyway, after seeing what Sarah's Kids had to offer, I decided I wanted to have cute Christmas pictures this year with Haley in a *gasp* dress. We found one we loved, but quickly ran into a snag. Haley is way tall and way skinny. Any dress that fits her enough not to fall off within two steps will leave her tiny booty hanging out the bottom. I asked one of the owners her opinion and she offered to alter a size 2 to fit around her skinny self. What a sweet offer! After further discussion, we concluded that Haley needed a 6-9 month size to fit her waist and a 3T to fit her long legs. The sweet owner said, "I tell you what, why don't I just cut you a new one?" What? "How much extra will that be?" "Nothing...I live in front of a sewing machine...it's no problem." What a sweet gift from my Jesus! Not only did we find a great Christmas dress for Haley, but we basically got a custom dress at a really great price! Their website is still under construction, so give them time to get some more pictures up, but moms, you've got to check them out!

All that being said, Toby and I really enjoyed our 24 hours away. We were able to relax and enjoy each other's company without any pressures or responsibilities hanging over our heads. My favorite part of the weekend...simply holding his hand and strolling the beach in the sunshine.

Toby brushing off the sand after our walk on the beach...and not so happy with me for snapping a picture.