We are now three weeks after Christmas, and I'm sad to report that no, Ty did not make it home before the holiday. At my last post, there was no news and then suddenly...a glimmer of hope! On Friday, December 21 my phone rang. It was our social worker, Teresa. We were 4 days before Christmas and my heart stopped at the sight of her name on my caller ID...could this be the call we've been waiting for? She said, "Carey, I've run across a situation, but we haven't talked about it before so I wanted to see what you thought. I've found a baby boy in the foster system in Missouri. He is 11 months old today...and his name is Tai'Vone." (pronounced Ty - Von). I asked her to repeat his name, just to make sure I heard her right. She said she had limited information and in order to learn more about him we had to submit our homestudy, but she needed our permission to do so. I didn't know what to say. I've envisioned a newborn in my mind for the last year, so I didn't know what to do with this twist. I called Toby and he said without hesitation, "Yes, let's learn more about him."
With that, Teresa sent the necessary paperwork and requested more information on baby Tai'Vone. I just knew in my heart that if I could see a picture of his little face, I would know if he was mine or not. Teresa cautioned us that it would probably be after the first of the year before we heard anything, so we waited and prayed. Day after day the idea grew on me. This Tai and Jake would be 5 months apart...a great challenge now to manage two one year olds, but how fun to have a best buddy to grow up with. I quickly became attached to the idea and waited not so patiently for business to resume in the new year. Days and then weeks passed with no word. We prayed for Abba to fling the doors wide open or slam them shut as we proceeded with this child.
Today, January 21 is Tai'Vone's first birthday. Secretly, I had hoped that we would somehow get to celebrate this day with him. He has been removed from the available child registry where Teresa first found him and we have not received a single response from his social worker. Perhaps this is a closed door.
So what does this mean? Did my God fail me? Did He let me down on His promise? There are many things that I don't know, but I do know that my God ALWAYS keeps His promises...always. It is most likely that I misunderstood the original "deadline" of Christmas or maybe I was overly eager. Whatever the truth is, my God is still good. He is the one who planted the love for Ty in my and Toby's hearts and He will be the one to bring him home in His timing. Above all else, I know that Abba loves me, He sees and understands my hurt and impatience, and He has amazing things planned for me and my family...inlcuding Ty.
Toby and I are nearing the end of 21 days of prayer and fasting. My greatest plea is for Ty to come home during this window. This may or may not happen and that is ok. We are now praying for direction as we near the one year mark of this adoption journey. Do we continue to pursue a domestic adoption? Do we investigate international adoption? Do we put off adoption for now and have more biological children? I have so many questions and so few answers today, but I know that Abba has a plan...a great plan. And when He's ready, He'll tell us which road to take.
I have been so touched by the many, many people who have asked about Ty and have prayed for him. You will never know the depth of gratitude that comes from this mama's heart to hear of others who love my baby boy and are standing with us to see God's faithfulness. I know He'll come through...He always does.
Related posts:
12/18/12 - One week to go...
10/11/12 - Bread crumbs while we wait
9/23/12 - A bump in the road
7/10/12 - Save the adoption credit
6/29/12 - Bezi's Grand Opening
6/22/12 - We're over the first hump
5/21/12 - Out of the mouths of babes
5/13/12 - A far away dream comes near
Showing posts with label adoption. Show all posts
Showing posts with label adoption. Show all posts
Monday, January 21, 2013
Tuesday, December 18, 2012
One week to go?
I have shared with you and stood firm on God's word to me that He would bring Ty home around Christmas. Well, here we are, one week before Christmas and no baby...not even a hint of a baby. At times I feel like Noah - standing on the corner proclaiming this absurd promise from the Lord. Some days I am confident and hopeful, other days I am full of doubt. Either way, my God is faithful, He is trustworthy and He is good. So many of you have been sweet to ask how things are going, but the truth is there's nothing new to share. Today we are still waiting to be matched with Ty's birthmother.
Should Christmas come and go next week with no sign of a baby, what does that mean? I don't know. I wish I had the answers. Maybe I heard Him wrong. Maybe I misunderstood. Maybe His timing is still different. Maybe we keep waiting. The one thing I do know is that my God doesn't need me to defend Him. I am human and I will do my best in hearing Him, loving Him and serving Him. So today, we continue to wait...hopeful to bring home our sweet baby boy in time for Christmas. Thank you for your continued prayers.
Related posts:
10/11/12 - Bread crumbs while we wait
9/23/12 - A bump in the road
7/10/12 - Save the adoption credit
6/29/12 - Bezi's Grand Opening
6/22/12 - We're over the first hump
5/21/12 - Out of the mouths of babes
5/13/12 - A far away dream comes near
Should Christmas come and go next week with no sign of a baby, what does that mean? I don't know. I wish I had the answers. Maybe I heard Him wrong. Maybe I misunderstood. Maybe His timing is still different. Maybe we keep waiting. The one thing I do know is that my God doesn't need me to defend Him. I am human and I will do my best in hearing Him, loving Him and serving Him. So today, we continue to wait...hopeful to bring home our sweet baby boy in time for Christmas. Thank you for your continued prayers.
Related posts:
10/11/12 - Bread crumbs while we wait
9/23/12 - A bump in the road
7/10/12 - Save the adoption credit
6/29/12 - Bezi's Grand Opening
6/22/12 - We're over the first hump
5/21/12 - Out of the mouths of babes
5/13/12 - A far away dream comes near
Thursday, October 11, 2012
Bread crumbs while we wait...
Well, we've done it...everything in our power toward Ty's adoption. Our profile has been completed and distributed and now we just wait on word of a match.
I had the opportunity to share pieces of our stories with some moms this morning, and I told one of them that as I look back over the last five years or so, I can clearly see building blocks. Each new thing God has asked us to do is a little bit bigger than the thing before. I feel like I can look back and see a pattern...we chose to be obedient, Abba came through bigger and better than we could have imagined, and our faith and trust in Him grew. So next time, if He asks us to do something even bigger, we can know without a shadow of a doubt that He's good for it. Not only has He not ever failed me, but Abba always blows my mind with the outpouring of His goodness. My Jesus never does anything "good enough" or "oh, that will do." No way, He gives greater than we can ask, think or imagine!
In that spirit, Abba knows that waiting is not something I'm very good at. Ok really...who honestly likes waiting in the unknown? Exactly, point proven. So anyway, when we were on our journey from Tennessee back to Alabama and I felt at the end of my rope, Jesus would always give me what I called "bread crumbs"...a little nugget to cling to, a reminder that He's working on things that I can not see, and that He never has and never will leave me. This journey has been no different. Over the last two weeks He's given us a few bread crumbs to cling to...
Last week I toted the kids back and forth to Office Depot with me while we were working to get our profiles printed. I told Haley that we were making some books to help us bring baby Ty home. She wasn't really interested in more detail, but was rather satisfied to climb up and down the boxes of paper and push the buttons on the calculators. (Yes, on that day, I was that mom.) So anyway, one night while I was working on dinner, Haley was playing with a toy phone and handed it to Toby, "Here Daddy, it's for you." Toby almost always plays along, "Who is it, Haley?" Without skipping a beat or even giving much thought she replied, "It's baby Ty's mommy." Toby and I froze and stared at each other, Haley had already moved on to the next thing. I thought to myself, why yes, Haley, we are in fact waiting on a phone call from baby Ty's mommy. I tell you, children have such a strong connection to the Spirit. Please encourage that in your children and pay attention to the "random ramblings" that come out of their mouths. They may unknowingly be the keepers of great secrets!
My second bread crumb came a few days ago at the grocery store. The kids and I were watching our cashier scan our items when a young family came up to the lane beside us. One little boy, maybe about 2 or 3, climbed out of the buggy without his parents noticing, came over to my lane and tried to be so helpful by handing my cashier an onion in a produce bag. He was so cute and so sweet and so confused as to why she wasn't taking it. We both said hello to him and commented to each other about how cute he was. Then I heard his father behind me in a strong, commanding voice, "Ty, Ty. Come here!" They apologized for him bothering us, but I was still in shock at what I'd just heard. I asked his mother, "I'm sorry, but what is his name?" She absentmindedly replied, "Tyrese" while she tried to wrangle her three small children. His dad called his name at least another 5 times before they pulled out of the line next to me to find a faster cashier. I couldn't take my eyes off of the sweet little boy, with my boy's name! I am amazed at the details that had to play out for me to experience those few, precious seconds. Another sweet gift from my Jesus...a reminder that He hasn't left us and He's still working, even though we can't see it.
From the very beginning of this process, Abba has impressed "Christmas" on my heart. Ty will be born and will come home around Christmas. Sometimes I walk in great confidence of that promise, and sometimes I feel like I'm way out in left field, but recently He has been reminding me of that detail...Christmas. Over and over and over, He's told me..."Christmas." And lately, He's gotten a bit pushy about it..."I told you Christmas. You might need to get his space ready for him!!" Oh, but, uh...that's going to require some movement behind my faith. To which He replied, "Exactly." Between you and me...I'm afraid of being wrong. What if I am way out in left field and Christmas comes and goes with no baby? What then? If all we've invested is paperwork and prayers then I can blow it off as, "Oh well, I was wrong, we'll just keep waiting." But if I have an entire nursery set up, waiting for my tiny son to come home in +/- 75 days and then he doesn't...I don't know if I can look at that space. Will be a painful reminder of a failure? SO, here's what we're going to do...we're going to be obedient. Toby and I have CHOSEN to be obedient, even if it seems ridiculous! I mean, how ridiculous did Noah look building a boat on dry land in a place that had never seen rain?!? Ok, so I will take a BIG step out there, risk looking totally ridiculous and wait patiently for my God, my King Jesus, to come through on His latest promise..."I will bring you Ty...this Christmas."
Related posts:
9/23/12 - A bump in the road
7/10/12 - Save the adoption credit
6/29/12 - Bezi's Grand Opening
6/22/12 - We're over the first hump
5/21/12 - Out of the mouths of babes
5/13/12 - A far away dream comes near
Click here to see our profile in its entirety.
Our agency has advised us to spread the word far and wide that we are adopting, because you never know where that baby will come from. So please keep us in mind if you ever hear mention of adoption. Our social worker's contact information is available on the last page of our profile. We also ask that you please pray with us as we wait out the remaining months and that God will clearly bring us to the path that leads to our son, Ty.
I had the opportunity to share pieces of our stories with some moms this morning, and I told one of them that as I look back over the last five years or so, I can clearly see building blocks. Each new thing God has asked us to do is a little bit bigger than the thing before. I feel like I can look back and see a pattern...we chose to be obedient, Abba came through bigger and better than we could have imagined, and our faith and trust in Him grew. So next time, if He asks us to do something even bigger, we can know without a shadow of a doubt that He's good for it. Not only has He not ever failed me, but Abba always blows my mind with the outpouring of His goodness. My Jesus never does anything "good enough" or "oh, that will do." No way, He gives greater than we can ask, think or imagine!
In that spirit, Abba knows that waiting is not something I'm very good at. Ok really...who honestly likes waiting in the unknown? Exactly, point proven. So anyway, when we were on our journey from Tennessee back to Alabama and I felt at the end of my rope, Jesus would always give me what I called "bread crumbs"...a little nugget to cling to, a reminder that He's working on things that I can not see, and that He never has and never will leave me. This journey has been no different. Over the last two weeks He's given us a few bread crumbs to cling to...
Last week I toted the kids back and forth to Office Depot with me while we were working to get our profiles printed. I told Haley that we were making some books to help us bring baby Ty home. She wasn't really interested in more detail, but was rather satisfied to climb up and down the boxes of paper and push the buttons on the calculators. (Yes, on that day, I was that mom.) So anyway, one night while I was working on dinner, Haley was playing with a toy phone and handed it to Toby, "Here Daddy, it's for you." Toby almost always plays along, "Who is it, Haley?" Without skipping a beat or even giving much thought she replied, "It's baby Ty's mommy." Toby and I froze and stared at each other, Haley had already moved on to the next thing. I thought to myself, why yes, Haley, we are in fact waiting on a phone call from baby Ty's mommy. I tell you, children have such a strong connection to the Spirit. Please encourage that in your children and pay attention to the "random ramblings" that come out of their mouths. They may unknowingly be the keepers of great secrets!
My second bread crumb came a few days ago at the grocery store. The kids and I were watching our cashier scan our items when a young family came up to the lane beside us. One little boy, maybe about 2 or 3, climbed out of the buggy without his parents noticing, came over to my lane and tried to be so helpful by handing my cashier an onion in a produce bag. He was so cute and so sweet and so confused as to why she wasn't taking it. We both said hello to him and commented to each other about how cute he was. Then I heard his father behind me in a strong, commanding voice, "Ty, Ty. Come here!" They apologized for him bothering us, but I was still in shock at what I'd just heard. I asked his mother, "I'm sorry, but what is his name?" She absentmindedly replied, "Tyrese" while she tried to wrangle her three small children. His dad called his name at least another 5 times before they pulled out of the line next to me to find a faster cashier. I couldn't take my eyes off of the sweet little boy, with my boy's name! I am amazed at the details that had to play out for me to experience those few, precious seconds. Another sweet gift from my Jesus...a reminder that He hasn't left us and He's still working, even though we can't see it.
From the very beginning of this process, Abba has impressed "Christmas" on my heart. Ty will be born and will come home around Christmas. Sometimes I walk in great confidence of that promise, and sometimes I feel like I'm way out in left field, but recently He has been reminding me of that detail...Christmas. Over and over and over, He's told me..."Christmas." And lately, He's gotten a bit pushy about it..."I told you Christmas. You might need to get his space ready for him!!" Oh, but, uh...that's going to require some movement behind my faith. To which He replied, "Exactly." Between you and me...I'm afraid of being wrong. What if I am way out in left field and Christmas comes and goes with no baby? What then? If all we've invested is paperwork and prayers then I can blow it off as, "Oh well, I was wrong, we'll just keep waiting." But if I have an entire nursery set up, waiting for my tiny son to come home in +/- 75 days and then he doesn't...I don't know if I can look at that space. Will be a painful reminder of a failure? SO, here's what we're going to do...we're going to be obedient. Toby and I have CHOSEN to be obedient, even if it seems ridiculous! I mean, how ridiculous did Noah look building a boat on dry land in a place that had never seen rain?!? Ok, so I will take a BIG step out there, risk looking totally ridiculous and wait patiently for my God, my King Jesus, to come through on His latest promise..."I will bring you Ty...this Christmas."
As Haley and I have studied Noah over the last few weeks, I have drilled into her head...
GOD ALWAYS KEEPS HIS PROMISES!
Related posts:
9/23/12 - A bump in the road
7/10/12 - Save the adoption credit
6/29/12 - Bezi's Grand Opening
6/22/12 - We're over the first hump
5/21/12 - Out of the mouths of babes
5/13/12 - A far away dream comes near
Sunday, September 23, 2012
A bump in the road
We are so grateful to all of you who have been so encouraging on our adoption journey. I know it's been a while since my last update here, so let me catch you up to speed.
God has been so good, so clear, and provided so much confirmation to us through this process. This journey started back in March when I thought I was pregnant. I had the list of symptoms across the board...strange tiredness, nausea, heightened sense of smell, emotional, you name it. Any woman who's been there knows the emotional roller coaster you ride in your mind until you get clear, medical confirmation. So I was really disappointed when my first at home test was negative...didn't even tell Toby about that one. But the symptoms continued for another week, and since I'd gotten a false negative with Jake's pregnancy, I held out hope. I had done the math, and if I were pregnant, we would have a Christmas baby. The next week I had shared my thoughts with Toby and I took another test...negative. I was so bummed and confused and I launched myself into prayer over it for the next few days. Through many hours of conversation and questions with Abba, many dreams, and lots of time in worship, He revealed something really cool to me..."Carey, you're not pregnant, but your baby has been conceived." Ha, uh, weird. What am I suppose to do with that? After more questions and long talks with Toby, we became convinced that our baby was out there, now is the time to start the adoption process and we will bring him home around Christmas.
So we shared all of this with our adoption agency, including the visions Toby and I have had of our little boy. We've since learned that people don't usually put so many "specifics" on their adopted baby, but because these sweet people love Jesus and have seen Him do amazing things, they simply said, "Wow! That's incredible! We can't wait for the ride." They have been so encouraging and supportive. So we truck along, get through the challenging application process and are getting ready for our home study. The day before our first home study visit, a 17 year old girl, matching our description, called the agency. She was pregnant and wanted to give her baby for adoption. She was due the second week of January. As soon as our social worker mentioned this to us, I just knew, that I knew, that this was our baby. This was him! How beautiful, how perfect! We wouldn't even have to prepare a profile of our family - a scrapbook birthmothers will use to "shop" for an adoptive family. I got attached, really just to the idea since we knew very little else about the birthmother, but in my heart I knew she was carrying our son. So we prayed for that birthmother and that sweet baby day in and day out, and anxiously awaited the day of her big ultrasound to determine the sex of her baby. We knew that big day was coming around the end of August, but we didn't hear from our social worker. I refused the possibility and clung to the hope that this was our baby.
The last Friday morning of August, I was running errands with Haley and Jake in tow when my phone rang. It was her, the call I'd been waiting on. She was so sweet and so kind, but she didn't have an excitement in her voice like I'd hoped. She told me that the birthmother we'd been praying for was healthy, the pregnancy was going well, and she was having a girl. I was crushed. I sat in the parking lot of Sam's Club, not really in a state of shock as much as a "what do we do now?" state. After hanging up the phone, I cried and then cried some more, knowing my sweet Haley wouldn't understand what had just happened. Seeing that I was sad, she started singing a song she'd made up, "Don't you worry worry, Mommy. Don't you worry worry, Daddy." That was it, the whole song, but it was exactly what I needed to hear. So I pulled myself together and called another member of our agency. She already knew the news and was waiting on my call. I asked her, "What do we need to do to prepare our profile?"
So that's where we are. Our profile is almost finished and then we will begin "marketing" ourselves. I hate that term, but it's basically what it is. But I know that we are not just throwing ourselves out there, begging for someone to please choose us. Our profile will simply be a tool to connect us with the one, perfect birthmother who is carrying my little boy. Our prayer is for God to show us the path that leads to our son, and I know that He will do it.
Within a matter of days, Abba was able to show me the good in our disappointment. To be completely honest, I had allowed Satan to whisper lies to me, horrible lies...and I started to believe them. They were so horrible that I didn't even tell Toby about them. That's exactly the way Satan wanted it. As long as the lies were hidden in the dark places of my mind, they held power over me, but as soon as they were released into the light and brought out into the open they were broken! I would rock Jake at night and these thoughts would come through my mind, "You're not going to love that baby like you do Haley and Jake. That child will always be different. You're going to resent raising someone else's kid when he's sick or he turns out to be a heathen. God didn't tell you to do this. You made it up and you want people to say 'Oh, look how great Carey is'." The sad part is that I listened. I allowed doubt to creep into my mind. Are we suppose to adopt? Are we just out in left field here? The beauty of this disappointment was that I grieved over "loosing" that baby. If those horrible lies were true, then the knowledge of this baby being a girl would have been a relief, and it was far from it. God used my grief to help me knock out the lies, remind me of His promise and solidify my heart for this baby. Now I am more anxious than ever to have him in my arms!
This past Sunday, our confirming God spoke boldly again. At the end of the service our pastor asked us to hold out our hands and repeat after him. I hadn't even been focused on our new son that day and was a bit distracted, but decided to buckle down and focus on the words coming out of his mouth..."Now to Him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us." As soon as those last words came out of my mouth, it was as if a sound wave or something had been traveling through the air and it hit me, nearly knocking me back. I clearly heard Abba's voice, "I will bring you Ty." And again He impressed Christmas on my heart. It was so clear, so powerful, and so out of nowhere that I crumpled into tears. Even now, He is reminding me of His promise and that His timing is perfect. We are holding onto that as we ride out the rest of our journey in bringing our baby boy home!
Related posts:
7/10/12 - Save the adoption credit
6/29/12 - Bezi's Grand Opening
6/22/12 - We're over the first hump
5/21/12 - Out of the mouths of babes
5/13/12 - A far away dream comes near
God has been so good, so clear, and provided so much confirmation to us through this process. This journey started back in March when I thought I was pregnant. I had the list of symptoms across the board...strange tiredness, nausea, heightened sense of smell, emotional, you name it. Any woman who's been there knows the emotional roller coaster you ride in your mind until you get clear, medical confirmation. So I was really disappointed when my first at home test was negative...didn't even tell Toby about that one. But the symptoms continued for another week, and since I'd gotten a false negative with Jake's pregnancy, I held out hope. I had done the math, and if I were pregnant, we would have a Christmas baby. The next week I had shared my thoughts with Toby and I took another test...negative. I was so bummed and confused and I launched myself into prayer over it for the next few days. Through many hours of conversation and questions with Abba, many dreams, and lots of time in worship, He revealed something really cool to me..."Carey, you're not pregnant, but your baby has been conceived." Ha, uh, weird. What am I suppose to do with that? After more questions and long talks with Toby, we became convinced that our baby was out there, now is the time to start the adoption process and we will bring him home around Christmas.
So we shared all of this with our adoption agency, including the visions Toby and I have had of our little boy. We've since learned that people don't usually put so many "specifics" on their adopted baby, but because these sweet people love Jesus and have seen Him do amazing things, they simply said, "Wow! That's incredible! We can't wait for the ride." They have been so encouraging and supportive. So we truck along, get through the challenging application process and are getting ready for our home study. The day before our first home study visit, a 17 year old girl, matching our description, called the agency. She was pregnant and wanted to give her baby for adoption. She was due the second week of January. As soon as our social worker mentioned this to us, I just knew, that I knew, that this was our baby. This was him! How beautiful, how perfect! We wouldn't even have to prepare a profile of our family - a scrapbook birthmothers will use to "shop" for an adoptive family. I got attached, really just to the idea since we knew very little else about the birthmother, but in my heart I knew she was carrying our son. So we prayed for that birthmother and that sweet baby day in and day out, and anxiously awaited the day of her big ultrasound to determine the sex of her baby. We knew that big day was coming around the end of August, but we didn't hear from our social worker. I refused the possibility and clung to the hope that this was our baby.
The last Friday morning of August, I was running errands with Haley and Jake in tow when my phone rang. It was her, the call I'd been waiting on. She was so sweet and so kind, but she didn't have an excitement in her voice like I'd hoped. She told me that the birthmother we'd been praying for was healthy, the pregnancy was going well, and she was having a girl. I was crushed. I sat in the parking lot of Sam's Club, not really in a state of shock as much as a "what do we do now?" state. After hanging up the phone, I cried and then cried some more, knowing my sweet Haley wouldn't understand what had just happened. Seeing that I was sad, she started singing a song she'd made up, "Don't you worry worry, Mommy. Don't you worry worry, Daddy." That was it, the whole song, but it was exactly what I needed to hear. So I pulled myself together and called another member of our agency. She already knew the news and was waiting on my call. I asked her, "What do we need to do to prepare our profile?"
So that's where we are. Our profile is almost finished and then we will begin "marketing" ourselves. I hate that term, but it's basically what it is. But I know that we are not just throwing ourselves out there, begging for someone to please choose us. Our profile will simply be a tool to connect us with the one, perfect birthmother who is carrying my little boy. Our prayer is for God to show us the path that leads to our son, and I know that He will do it.
Within a matter of days, Abba was able to show me the good in our disappointment. To be completely honest, I had allowed Satan to whisper lies to me, horrible lies...and I started to believe them. They were so horrible that I didn't even tell Toby about them. That's exactly the way Satan wanted it. As long as the lies were hidden in the dark places of my mind, they held power over me, but as soon as they were released into the light and brought out into the open they were broken! I would rock Jake at night and these thoughts would come through my mind, "You're not going to love that baby like you do Haley and Jake. That child will always be different. You're going to resent raising someone else's kid when he's sick or he turns out to be a heathen. God didn't tell you to do this. You made it up and you want people to say 'Oh, look how great Carey is'." The sad part is that I listened. I allowed doubt to creep into my mind. Are we suppose to adopt? Are we just out in left field here? The beauty of this disappointment was that I grieved over "loosing" that baby. If those horrible lies were true, then the knowledge of this baby being a girl would have been a relief, and it was far from it. God used my grief to help me knock out the lies, remind me of His promise and solidify my heart for this baby. Now I am more anxious than ever to have him in my arms!
This past Sunday, our confirming God spoke boldly again. At the end of the service our pastor asked us to hold out our hands and repeat after him. I hadn't even been focused on our new son that day and was a bit distracted, but decided to buckle down and focus on the words coming out of his mouth..."Now to Him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us." As soon as those last words came out of my mouth, it was as if a sound wave or something had been traveling through the air and it hit me, nearly knocking me back. I clearly heard Abba's voice, "I will bring you Ty." And again He impressed Christmas on my heart. It was so clear, so powerful, and so out of nowhere that I crumpled into tears. Even now, He is reminding me of His promise and that His timing is perfect. We are holding onto that as we ride out the rest of our journey in bringing our baby boy home!
Related posts:
7/10/12 - Save the adoption credit
6/29/12 - Bezi's Grand Opening
6/22/12 - We're over the first hump
5/21/12 - Out of the mouths of babes
5/13/12 - A far away dream comes near
Tuesday, July 10, 2012
Save the adoption credit
First of all, thank you SO MUCH to all of you who have been so supportive through our adoption process so far. Many of you have inquired of our progress, have offered prayers on our behalf and have supported Bezi's Creations in an effort to help us raise the funds necessary to bring our son home. As many of you know, adopting a baby is certainly not a "cheap" endeavor. When God told us to start this process, even before we had the money in the bank, we took a leap of faith and began walking down this road. One crucial piece to the funding of our adoption is the adoption tax credit available to families, however this credit is set to expire on December 31, 2012. If this happens, Toby and I will be unable to capitalize on this wonderful opportunity and great aid in bringing our son home. The following is copied from another blog and I would appreciate the 5 minutes of your time it would require to help ensure the adoption credit gets renewed. Also, please share this important information with your friends and families via email, FaceBook and the like. Thank you so much for your continued support!
Excerpt from Chapters blog:
To put it simply, it means good families who want to change a life and/or provide a loving, stable home but don't make quite enough money might not have the income to adopt a child in need. (Just so you know, adoption can cost anywhere from $13-$40K on average if adopting privately.)
So this credit going away makes me incredibly sad. How many kids in the future are going to stay in the system because families just can't afford adoption?
I wrote my first ever letter to a Representative today and I'm asking if someone (ANYONE) would take the time to copy this letter (below) and click here to send (typically) a web form to your Representative. It will take 10 minutes of your life. But it could change someone else's forever.
I hope I've made this really, really easy:
PS: Will you consider re-posting to get the word out?
Excerpt from Chapters blog:
Advocate for Kids
Before we started the process of adopting LC, we knew jack about adopting period. As you can imagine, we've learned a lot
recently about the ABC's of the adoption process and both how rewarding
it can be emotionally and how draining it can be financially. Please
note: I'm not complaining. Every penny we've
spent has been over and over and over again worth it. But if you are
thinking about adoption or know someone who is or has...or just if you can find it in your heart to care at all about all the children who need a family, there's something you need to know.
There is good news: there is a "adoption assistance" tax credit that, traditionally, has helped offset some (not all) of the costs of adoption.What does that mean? Or maybe why should you care?
The bad news: at the end of 2012, if people don't say something, its gone. In fact, in 2012, it's already been changed from refundable (you get money back) to non-refundable (it just means you might not have to pay so much if you owe income taxes).
To put it simply, it means good families who want to change a life and/or provide a loving, stable home but don't make quite enough money might not have the income to adopt a child in need. (Just so you know, adoption can cost anywhere from $13-$40K on average if adopting privately.)
So this credit going away makes me incredibly sad. How many kids in the future are going to stay in the system because families just can't afford adoption?
I wrote my first ever letter to a Representative today and I'm asking if someone (ANYONE) would take the time to copy this letter (below) and click here to send (typically) a web form to your Representative. It will take 10 minutes of your life. But it could change someone else's forever.
I hope I've made this really, really easy:
Dear Representative INSERT NAME:I am writing to ask you to support the adoption tax credit, which is set to expire on December 31, 2012. The adoption tax credit is especially important to me because INSERT REASON (like: you're planning to adopt, you know someone who has adopted, or you think adoption is a worthy cause).The adoption tax credit is essential to ensuring that as many children as possible are able to find families and that the cost of adoption is not prohibitive to children being raised in loving, caring environments. I am asking you to take action on behalf of those who have made both a personal and financial sacrifice to support children in our country and in other countries who are in need.Please use your vote to make sure the adoption tax credit would be permanent, refundable, inclusive of all types of adoption, and remain a “flat” tax for children with special needs.On behalf of the countless children waiting to be adopted, and the many thousands of families that stand to suffer financially with the loss of the adoption tax credit, thank you for your attention to this important issue.
Sincerely,NAMECITY, STATEEMAIL ADDRESS
PS: Will you consider re-posting to get the word out?
Friday, June 29, 2012
Bezi's Grand Opening
Bezi's Creations is ready for its Grand Opening on Etsy! Please take a minute to stop by, check things out and pass the word along. For this weekend only I'm offering free domestic shipping in celebration of our big kickoff. Simply enter the code "grandopen" during checkout.
Make sure to check back often as I have tons of new ideas and great new products coming down the pipeline. I just wanted to get Etsy up and running with what I already have available. Remember that all proceeds go toward our adoption expenses. Thanks again for your support!
If you're on FaceBook, make sure to like our page, www.facebook.com/beziscreations. Also in celebration of Bezi's Grand Opening weekend we will be giving away a $20 gift card (either to Bezi's or Amazon, winner's choice). The winner will be chosen by random.org once the FaceBook page reaches 100 likes. So help spread the word!
Thanks again for all of your prayers, encouragement and support in bringing our baby boy home!!
Friday, June 22, 2012
We're over the first hump
We have had so many people ask about how the adoption process is coming, so I wanted to drop a quick note to keep everyone in the loop. A few weeks ago we turned in our mountain of paperwork. All of it was reasonable, it was just a lot of stuff to collect...certified copies of our birth certificates, marriage certificates and deed on our house, reference letters from friends and family, proof of employment and insurance, letters from our bank confirming our financial assertions, financial records, autobiographies, medical exams, etc etc etc. So anyway, we finally got through all of that and are on to the next phase.
We met with our social worker last night and were so encouraged by everything she had to share. We had some concerns regarding the financial "risks" we are undertaking as spelled out in the contract we have to sign with the agency, but she was a great comfort. She assured us that they do a lot of screening with the birthmothers on the front end, and statistically, once we are matched with a birthmother the chances of everything working out are really good...at least that is this agency's experience. She also walked us through the next few steps in more detail. We will begin the home study process this Sunday and will conclude it after the July 4th holiday. The home study consists of two visits from our social worker to our home. She will evaluate how we relate to and "manage" our children, the safety and cleanliness of our home, and we will discuss in more detail our parenting styles, childhoods, and motivations and expectations regarding the adoption. The home study process is a standard event that is required by the state to be considered a suitable adoptive parent, regardless of where the adopted child comes from.
The home study should be complete around the middle of July at which point we will begin the education phase. We will have several conferences with a member of our agency who will provide us with information regarding the specific circumstances and needs of adopted children. This is one of the reasons that we are so happy to be working with this agency, Children of the World. This is not just business to them. They are dealing with people's lives and they take very seriously the opportunity they have to minister to us, the birthmother, and the adopted child.
At this point, we will be ready to receive our son and will begin the waiting process. There are several ways to "find" our son, many of which we will investigate further when that time comes. Once we are matched with a birthmother through a mutual selection process, the majority of our expenses will come due. The birthmother's individual situation will determine how much financial help she needs from us regarding her basic needs as well as assistance from the agency. The more help she needs, the more it will cost us. The agency estimates a maximum expense of around $18,000. To be honest, we do not have $18,000 sitting in our bank accounts today. All we know is that God told us to start this process several months ago. He told me specifically then that He will provide what we need, when we need it, to trust Him and begin the process...even before the money is sitting in the bank. So here we are. We have a saved a good bit that will get us started and I have started Bezi's Creations in an effort to raise some of the funds, but we are taking one step at a time...confident that He will make good on His promise, just like He always does!
On the Bezi's front, I am getting ready to open a shop on Etsy in the next week or so. I am so excited about all that God has shown me through this business and I hope you will take a minute to check it out. The FaceBook page will stay up to keep you posted on our adoption progress, to display new products, and to offer promotions.
Thank you so much to all of you that have been so encouraging. Please continue to pray for us, our son, and his birthmother. Please pray for God's guidance as we all make decisions and for all things to play out in His perfect timing. As always, we are humbled and honored to be used in expanding His Kingdom and spreading His love.
We met with our social worker last night and were so encouraged by everything she had to share. We had some concerns regarding the financial "risks" we are undertaking as spelled out in the contract we have to sign with the agency, but she was a great comfort. She assured us that they do a lot of screening with the birthmothers on the front end, and statistically, once we are matched with a birthmother the chances of everything working out are really good...at least that is this agency's experience. She also walked us through the next few steps in more detail. We will begin the home study process this Sunday and will conclude it after the July 4th holiday. The home study consists of two visits from our social worker to our home. She will evaluate how we relate to and "manage" our children, the safety and cleanliness of our home, and we will discuss in more detail our parenting styles, childhoods, and motivations and expectations regarding the adoption. The home study process is a standard event that is required by the state to be considered a suitable adoptive parent, regardless of where the adopted child comes from.
The home study should be complete around the middle of July at which point we will begin the education phase. We will have several conferences with a member of our agency who will provide us with information regarding the specific circumstances and needs of adopted children. This is one of the reasons that we are so happy to be working with this agency, Children of the World. This is not just business to them. They are dealing with people's lives and they take very seriously the opportunity they have to minister to us, the birthmother, and the adopted child.
At this point, we will be ready to receive our son and will begin the waiting process. There are several ways to "find" our son, many of which we will investigate further when that time comes. Once we are matched with a birthmother through a mutual selection process, the majority of our expenses will come due. The birthmother's individual situation will determine how much financial help she needs from us regarding her basic needs as well as assistance from the agency. The more help she needs, the more it will cost us. The agency estimates a maximum expense of around $18,000. To be honest, we do not have $18,000 sitting in our bank accounts today. All we know is that God told us to start this process several months ago. He told me specifically then that He will provide what we need, when we need it, to trust Him and begin the process...even before the money is sitting in the bank. So here we are. We have a saved a good bit that will get us started and I have started Bezi's Creations in an effort to raise some of the funds, but we are taking one step at a time...confident that He will make good on His promise, just like He always does!
On the Bezi's front, I am getting ready to open a shop on Etsy in the next week or so. I am so excited about all that God has shown me through this business and I hope you will take a minute to check it out. The FaceBook page will stay up to keep you posted on our adoption progress, to display new products, and to offer promotions.
Thank you so much to all of you that have been so encouraging. Please continue to pray for us, our son, and his birthmother. Please pray for God's guidance as we all make decisions and for all things to play out in His perfect timing. As always, we are humbled and honored to be used in expanding His Kingdom and spreading His love.
Tuesday, May 22, 2012
A start up business...doing it right
So I told you a few weeks ago that I felt God leading me to start a business, Bezi's Creations. Crazy, right? The goal is to raise money for our adoption and things are coming together. I can see the ball start to move. Word is getting out and I've landed several encouraging orders. Now, I'm a CPA by trade and I love the accounting of small businesses (weird, I know) so I was determined to do the business side right. At least until I started investigating...sales tax at 9%, business licenses, fees for a business checking account, and on and on. I'm just a little guy and these start up expenses were really discouraging. Then I started making excuses..."If I'm discreet, I'm not likely to get a sales tax audit. My proceeds are going toward a great cause. Surely I can get away without having a business license." I mean, the City of Mobile business license is $130 alone. That's a huge investment at this level. Ok, so as I'm writing this out it's becoming obvious how embarrassing this is to admit. Just know that I'm being transparent here.
Anyway, I was taking Haley to gymnastics a few weeks ago and noticed a sign on a local bank advertising "Free Business Checking." Ok, that sounds promising, I thought. Considering every other bank I looked at had some kind of monthly fee tied to it, just for the privilege of having a business account open. I opted to pursue this one. Besides I couldn't justify using a "personal" checking account for my business...felt deceitful. (Funny to be worried about that after my previous confessions.) So I went to open my free account the next week while Haley was in gymnastics, only to have the process halted with the question, "Do you have a business license?" Ugh. They wouldn't open the account without a business license, so I started stewing over it. As I drove back home I was truly on the fence. I called my mom and Toby desperate for one of them to push me one way or the other. On the one hand, I really felt like I should do this right, but on my frugal hand $130 just seemed like a huge investment. Of course, neither my mom nor Toby answered their phones. I was left to take my question to Jesus. Funny, that's what I should have done in the first place, but I had already decided that I didn't like the answer I knew He'd give me. All afternoon I'd been hearing "do it right, do it right" in my spirit. It was like a broken record and I was running from it. When faced with nobody else to talk to about it, and started whining, "But God, after the business stuff and the start up product it will be like $500 to even get it off the ground!!! That's $500 we could put straight toward the adoption!" Immediately, as clear as if Jesus were sitting in my passenger seat I heard, "Do you trust me to multiply that?" Long sigh....Ok, I guess I will. I steered my car toward City Hall.
About this time, my mom called me back. She's also a CPA and has a niche in helping small businesses. Her words were further confirmation, "Yeah, you probably should do it right. It's hard, but this is why so many small businesses don't make it. There's just so much investment on the front end." I made it to downtown and made about two or three laps around before finding a parking spot. I had made up my mind, I was going to do this RIGHT all the way around. As I was circling downtown a church tour bus pulled out in front of me. On it's rear in huge writing was further confirmation, "'But all things must be done properly and in an orderly manner.' 1 Corinthians 14:40" Ha! I couldn't help but laugh. Ok, God. I get it. I'm going to do it right. I later looked up that verse in another translation where "properly" was translated as "honestly"...figures.
So I load up Jake in the stroller and arm myself with snacks, the iPod, and entertainment for Haley and head into the government building. As we walked inside Toby returned my call. He had run an errand during his lunch break and had a few minutes to spare in the car on the way back to work. Having not been privy to my previous hour's thoughts, he launched into a list of pros and cons and questions regarding the business checking account and the business license. I couldn't get a word in, so I listened as the kids and I circled the giant lobby. Suddenly, Toby stopped mid-sentence. "Carey, this bus just pulled out in front of me! You're not going to believe what it says on the back! 'But all things must be done properly and in an orderly manner.' 1 Corinthians 14:40". I was floored!!! "Oh, my Jesus! Toby, I just saw that same bus, not 15 minutes ago!!" I don't know how much more BILLBOARD you can get in instructions from God.
The scripture I've been soaking in lately is, "Your ears will hear a word behind you, 'This is the way, walk in it.' whenever you turn to the right or to the left." Isaiah 30:21. I don't think I can deny that in this case, I've been given my marching orders. So, I paid my $130 for my city business license, finished opening my checking account, obtained my county license and paid my first round of sales tax. All that's left is state sales tax and I'm working on that. I WILL do this right and will trust His leading. How can I dare ask Him to bless my time and my efforts if I'm going to cheat on step 1 of starting a business? Ridiculous!
Wouldn't you know that a week to the day when this snowball started I got a big order. An order for triplets! An order to more than recoup my business license expense. Ha! I will trust, I will walk and I will tell of His faithfulness!
I would love for you to stop by my FaceBook page and see what I have available. Also, if you'd be so kind as to pass the word along and share this page with your friends, that'd be great, too. Thanks for your help!
www.facebook.com/beziscreations
Anyway, I was taking Haley to gymnastics a few weeks ago and noticed a sign on a local bank advertising "Free Business Checking." Ok, that sounds promising, I thought. Considering every other bank I looked at had some kind of monthly fee tied to it, just for the privilege of having a business account open. I opted to pursue this one. Besides I couldn't justify using a "personal" checking account for my business...felt deceitful. (Funny to be worried about that after my previous confessions.) So I went to open my free account the next week while Haley was in gymnastics, only to have the process halted with the question, "Do you have a business license?" Ugh. They wouldn't open the account without a business license, so I started stewing over it. As I drove back home I was truly on the fence. I called my mom and Toby desperate for one of them to push me one way or the other. On the one hand, I really felt like I should do this right, but on my frugal hand $130 just seemed like a huge investment. Of course, neither my mom nor Toby answered their phones. I was left to take my question to Jesus. Funny, that's what I should have done in the first place, but I had already decided that I didn't like the answer I knew He'd give me. All afternoon I'd been hearing "do it right, do it right" in my spirit. It was like a broken record and I was running from it. When faced with nobody else to talk to about it, and started whining, "But God, after the business stuff and the start up product it will be like $500 to even get it off the ground!!! That's $500 we could put straight toward the adoption!" Immediately, as clear as if Jesus were sitting in my passenger seat I heard, "Do you trust me to multiply that?" Long sigh....Ok, I guess I will. I steered my car toward City Hall.
About this time, my mom called me back. She's also a CPA and has a niche in helping small businesses. Her words were further confirmation, "Yeah, you probably should do it right. It's hard, but this is why so many small businesses don't make it. There's just so much investment on the front end." I made it to downtown and made about two or three laps around before finding a parking spot. I had made up my mind, I was going to do this RIGHT all the way around. As I was circling downtown a church tour bus pulled out in front of me. On it's rear in huge writing was further confirmation, "'But all things must be done properly and in an orderly manner.' 1 Corinthians 14:40" Ha! I couldn't help but laugh. Ok, God. I get it. I'm going to do it right. I later looked up that verse in another translation where "properly" was translated as "honestly"...figures.
So I load up Jake in the stroller and arm myself with snacks, the iPod, and entertainment for Haley and head into the government building. As we walked inside Toby returned my call. He had run an errand during his lunch break and had a few minutes to spare in the car on the way back to work. Having not been privy to my previous hour's thoughts, he launched into a list of pros and cons and questions regarding the business checking account and the business license. I couldn't get a word in, so I listened as the kids and I circled the giant lobby. Suddenly, Toby stopped mid-sentence. "Carey, this bus just pulled out in front of me! You're not going to believe what it says on the back! 'But all things must be done properly and in an orderly manner.' 1 Corinthians 14:40". I was floored!!! "Oh, my Jesus! Toby, I just saw that same bus, not 15 minutes ago!!" I don't know how much more BILLBOARD you can get in instructions from God.
The scripture I've been soaking in lately is, "Your ears will hear a word behind you, 'This is the way, walk in it.' whenever you turn to the right or to the left." Isaiah 30:21. I don't think I can deny that in this case, I've been given my marching orders. So, I paid my $130 for my city business license, finished opening my checking account, obtained my county license and paid my first round of sales tax. All that's left is state sales tax and I'm working on that. I WILL do this right and will trust His leading. How can I dare ask Him to bless my time and my efforts if I'm going to cheat on step 1 of starting a business? Ridiculous!
Wouldn't you know that a week to the day when this snowball started I got a big order. An order for triplets! An order to more than recoup my business license expense. Ha! I will trust, I will walk and I will tell of His faithfulness!
I would love for you to stop by my FaceBook page and see what I have available. Also, if you'd be so kind as to pass the word along and share this page with your friends, that'd be great, too. Thanks for your help!
www.facebook.com/beziscreations
Monday, May 21, 2012
Out of the mouths of babes
Last night I was cleaning the kitchen before bed and had some rare alone time. I used it to launch into prayer for friends and family and eventually our adoption. The prayers came freely for our baby boy, his birth mother and the entire adoption process. The mountains in front of us just seem so big sometimes. There's the paperwork and the waiting, the fundraising, actually finding this sweet baby, possible health concerns at birth, bringing home a new baby, the adjustment for my other two kids, and the support or lack there of from our family. In the end, I begged Abba for another sign of confirmation. I just needed to be reassured that we are on the right path. This is a life altering decision that will forever effect our little family, our extended family, and our generations to come. I don't want to be anywhere but right in step with Him.
Toby and I have not shared anything with Haley about the adoption. Being only 3 years old, there's so much she won't understand. There will be lots of waiting, likely some disappointment, and of course the never ending questions. So we haven't discussed it with her at all and I guess we thought we'd wait until we were further along in the process before bringing her on board. Well, Abba beat me to it.
This morning as I was changing Jake's diaper after his morning nap, Haley came into his room carrying two naked baby dolls. She handed one to Jake and the other to me and she said, "This baby's for you cause you're going to have another baby." I froze. I looked at her and said, "What did you just say, sweetie?" She repeated herself, "You're going to have another baby." Not believing what I was hearing I asked, "What do you mean by that?" She was totally confident in her answer, "Jesus loves you. He's going to give you another baby." I sat there stunned. I'd call that "confirmation." So I shared a little about the road we are starting on. I asked her how she felt about have two baby brothers and she immediately got excited. She is the absolute best big sister to Jake and I know she will be to this new baby as well.
By the way, I had a physical done three days ago as part of the adoption process. My doctor ran a pregnancy test just to be sure...it was negative.
Thank you, Jesus, for my confirmation. Thank you for reminding me that You are in control of all things, that you hear me when I call to You, and You love me enough to answer the hard questions in my soul in a way that I cannot mistake. I know that You will walk us through every, single step of this season. The ones that will take us through valleys and the ones that will take us to mountain tops. You will be there, right in front of us, leading the way and we will give You ALL glory for each and every step.
Toby and I have not shared anything with Haley about the adoption. Being only 3 years old, there's so much she won't understand. There will be lots of waiting, likely some disappointment, and of course the never ending questions. So we haven't discussed it with her at all and I guess we thought we'd wait until we were further along in the process before bringing her on board. Well, Abba beat me to it.
This morning as I was changing Jake's diaper after his morning nap, Haley came into his room carrying two naked baby dolls. She handed one to Jake and the other to me and she said, "This baby's for you cause you're going to have another baby." I froze. I looked at her and said, "What did you just say, sweetie?" She repeated herself, "You're going to have another baby." Not believing what I was hearing I asked, "What do you mean by that?" She was totally confident in her answer, "Jesus loves you. He's going to give you another baby." I sat there stunned. I'd call that "confirmation." So I shared a little about the road we are starting on. I asked her how she felt about have two baby brothers and she immediately got excited. She is the absolute best big sister to Jake and I know she will be to this new baby as well.
By the way, I had a physical done three days ago as part of the adoption process. My doctor ran a pregnancy test just to be sure...it was negative.
Thank you, Jesus, for my confirmation. Thank you for reminding me that You are in control of all things, that you hear me when I call to You, and You love me enough to answer the hard questions in my soul in a way that I cannot mistake. I know that You will walk us through every, single step of this season. The ones that will take us through valleys and the ones that will take us to mountain tops. You will be there, right in front of us, leading the way and we will give You ALL glory for each and every step.
Sunday, May 13, 2012
A far away dream comes near
As long as Toby and I have been together...all the way back to high school, we've dreamed about one day adopting a baby. For me, that's just what it's been...a dream. I've always thought that someday it would be nice to entertain that idea, but for now it still seemed pretty far off. Toby, however, was on another page. A few weeks after Jake was born in July, Toby said, "I think we should adopt our next one." Hmm. We both want to have a big family, but I was fresh off of new baby hormones and not so interested in the idea. I gave him a half-hearted response, "Huh. Sure. Let's talk about it later." And with that the idea of adoption stayed a far away dream.
As the months wore on, Toby was relentless. Every few weeks he would bring up the idea, and when it came up again at the first of the year we were in the throws of selling, buying and moving. Again I brushed him off, "Let's get moved and settled before we launch into another life altering process." So, here we are. We've moved. We're settled. I'm out of excuses...and it came up again. Finally, I agreed to start praying about it. I asked Abba that if adopting a child was really in His plan for our near future then to change my heart and confirm this path. Wouldn't you know, He did just that. As I prayed over this for a few weeks I became more and more certain that this was something we should investigate. Adoption was suddenly in my face everywhere I turned. I got a call out of the blue from a Tennessee friend. They were in the middle of the adoption process and wanted some advice and prayer. On a rare date night out, Toby and I ended up at the movie theater watching October Baby. (Shameless plug - If you haven't seen October Baby, you need, need to see it. It has such great perspective and healing from so many angles. End shameless plug.) Toby and I had endless conversations about the idea and within a matter of weeks adoption went from a "nice idea for later" to me identifying a hole in my heart. Through these weeks of prayer I have become convinced that my baby is out there and I am not whole because he is not home with me. The best way to describe it is that I miss him. One of my babies is missing. Abba has His protective hand on my baby boy until we are able to meet him and bring him home. You see, this isn't about doing some good charity deed. In my heart I know that we are searching for this one child that has been earmarked for our family. I'm already attached to this baby I've never even met.
I suppose Toby's passion for our adoption started years ago. God gave him a vision and in it he saw he and I walking away. I was holding his hand and in his other hand was a two year old little boy. We know that Jake is not the boy he saw. During my weeks of prayer and searching I had a similar vision during worship at church one weekend. I saw my Jesus holding the sweet hand of my little boy. He was about two years old at the time and had the most adorable little face. His eyes were bursting with joy and the sight of him was so real that I felt like I could reach out and touch him. That was my baby. I just know it. Also during this time I was reading through my Bible and a name jumped off the page at me. It stayed in my head for days and I couldn't get away from it. It was my little boy's name. The name Abba gave him means "chance" and "fortunate." Rather fitting, I thought.
Now it's just a matter of following God's leading to the path that will take us to our son. We have contacted several different adoption avenues in Mobile and decided on Children of the World out of Fairhope, Alabama. We had our first lengthy visit with our social worker this past week and are so thrilled to be working with them. The people of this agency truly love the Lord and they love their jobs. They are deeply compassionate and caring people. We have received glowing references and love that they take their birthmothers under their wing and minister to them before and after the adoption. We are now working on our final application for the State of Alabama and are gathering lots of paperwork in preparation for our home study.
A few months back, before I began entertaining the idea of adoption, Jesus gave me specific instructions one Sunday morning. Our pastor was preaching a series on miracles and as he got started that morning, I found myself thinking, "We've seen so many miracles. I wonder where we're going next." Immediately Jesus responded to my spirit, "Adoption. I want you to start the process even before you have the funds sitting in the bank." Hmm...seemed random at the time. So we recognize that adoption is not only a great emotional investment, but it will require a great financial investment as well. In light of this, my Jesus graciously showed me where some of these funds will come from during a 4am feeding with Jake a few weeks ago. It was like a light had gone off in my head and everything clicked perfectly in place. I had been complaining to Toby just days earlier that I felt like I needed somewhere to focus my energy...outside of running our home. I mean, let's face it...you can only get so much satisfaction and sense of accomplishment out of 14 loads of laundry. I also have been dabbling in some new creative outlets and had wondered if maybe I could sell some of my creations. When the goal was extra spending cash it just didn't seem to make sense and the pieces just didn't seem to line up, but now there was a specific goal to strive for. I would use the skills I've been working on and the creativity He's been working to reveal to bring in the funds we would need to support the adoption. And just like that Bezi's Creations was born! Bezi comes from Bezalel in the Bible. God gave Bezalel the supernatural ability to envision and build all of the items for the tabernacle when the Isrealites were wandering the wilderness. This guy has just stuck out to me ever since I studied this with my Boothmakers a few years back. Mind you, I'm a CPA and have never thought myself to be crafty, so any time I come up with anything even remotely unique or cute I claim a "Bezalel moment." So anyway, Bezi's Creations will offer handpainted furniture (a new, super fun hobby) as well as styles and accessories for little ones including bibs and onesies with neck ties or pearls, month by month onesies to capture your baby's first year, and hooded towels great for snuggling up a freshly cleaned baby or wrapping up a toddler after a fun day at the beach or in the pool.
I am so excited for this new season, even though it will be chalked full of stuff to accomplish. My prayer over the last few days has been for God to show me how to manage my time, how to structure my day so that I can spend quality time with Him and my family and still take care of our home, gather the needed adoption papers, and get a business up and running. I tell you, my days of vegging out in front of the TV are long gone. But it's all good. I wouldn't change a thing. He has answered my prayers and so far all systems are running smoothly.
So, will you help us in this? Will you join with Toby and me in prayer that God will guide our steps and give us wisdom and discernment as we walk the road that will take us to our son? Will you pray for protection over our baby and his birthmother? And will you help me get the word out about Bezi's Creations? I have started a FaceBook page and would love for you to "like" it and spread the word by sharing it with your friends. My products will be available for sale on the FaceBook page and also I will have my first sale this coming Saturday. I'm so excited to get things going! Thank you in advance for all of your support in this season. I know my Jesus has some amazing blessings lined up for so many in the coming months. It's going to be an awesome adventure!
As the months wore on, Toby was relentless. Every few weeks he would bring up the idea, and when it came up again at the first of the year we were in the throws of selling, buying and moving. Again I brushed him off, "Let's get moved and settled before we launch into another life altering process." So, here we are. We've moved. We're settled. I'm out of excuses...and it came up again. Finally, I agreed to start praying about it. I asked Abba that if adopting a child was really in His plan for our near future then to change my heart and confirm this path. Wouldn't you know, He did just that. As I prayed over this for a few weeks I became more and more certain that this was something we should investigate. Adoption was suddenly in my face everywhere I turned. I got a call out of the blue from a Tennessee friend. They were in the middle of the adoption process and wanted some advice and prayer. On a rare date night out, Toby and I ended up at the movie theater watching October Baby. (Shameless plug - If you haven't seen October Baby, you need, need to see it. It has such great perspective and healing from so many angles. End shameless plug.) Toby and I had endless conversations about the idea and within a matter of weeks adoption went from a "nice idea for later" to me identifying a hole in my heart. Through these weeks of prayer I have become convinced that my baby is out there and I am not whole because he is not home with me. The best way to describe it is that I miss him. One of my babies is missing. Abba has His protective hand on my baby boy until we are able to meet him and bring him home. You see, this isn't about doing some good charity deed. In my heart I know that we are searching for this one child that has been earmarked for our family. I'm already attached to this baby I've never even met.
I suppose Toby's passion for our adoption started years ago. God gave him a vision and in it he saw he and I walking away. I was holding his hand and in his other hand was a two year old little boy. We know that Jake is not the boy he saw. During my weeks of prayer and searching I had a similar vision during worship at church one weekend. I saw my Jesus holding the sweet hand of my little boy. He was about two years old at the time and had the most adorable little face. His eyes were bursting with joy and the sight of him was so real that I felt like I could reach out and touch him. That was my baby. I just know it. Also during this time I was reading through my Bible and a name jumped off the page at me. It stayed in my head for days and I couldn't get away from it. It was my little boy's name. The name Abba gave him means "chance" and "fortunate." Rather fitting, I thought.
Now it's just a matter of following God's leading to the path that will take us to our son. We have contacted several different adoption avenues in Mobile and decided on Children of the World out of Fairhope, Alabama. We had our first lengthy visit with our social worker this past week and are so thrilled to be working with them. The people of this agency truly love the Lord and they love their jobs. They are deeply compassionate and caring people. We have received glowing references and love that they take their birthmothers under their wing and minister to them before and after the adoption. We are now working on our final application for the State of Alabama and are gathering lots of paperwork in preparation for our home study.
A few months back, before I began entertaining the idea of adoption, Jesus gave me specific instructions one Sunday morning. Our pastor was preaching a series on miracles and as he got started that morning, I found myself thinking, "We've seen so many miracles. I wonder where we're going next." Immediately Jesus responded to my spirit, "Adoption. I want you to start the process even before you have the funds sitting in the bank." Hmm...seemed random at the time. So we recognize that adoption is not only a great emotional investment, but it will require a great financial investment as well. In light of this, my Jesus graciously showed me where some of these funds will come from during a 4am feeding with Jake a few weeks ago. It was like a light had gone off in my head and everything clicked perfectly in place. I had been complaining to Toby just days earlier that I felt like I needed somewhere to focus my energy...outside of running our home. I mean, let's face it...you can only get so much satisfaction and sense of accomplishment out of 14 loads of laundry. I also have been dabbling in some new creative outlets and had wondered if maybe I could sell some of my creations. When the goal was extra spending cash it just didn't seem to make sense and the pieces just didn't seem to line up, but now there was a specific goal to strive for. I would use the skills I've been working on and the creativity He's been working to reveal to bring in the funds we would need to support the adoption. And just like that Bezi's Creations was born! Bezi comes from Bezalel in the Bible. God gave Bezalel the supernatural ability to envision and build all of the items for the tabernacle when the Isrealites were wandering the wilderness. This guy has just stuck out to me ever since I studied this with my Boothmakers a few years back. Mind you, I'm a CPA and have never thought myself to be crafty, so any time I come up with anything even remotely unique or cute I claim a "Bezalel moment." So anyway, Bezi's Creations will offer handpainted furniture (a new, super fun hobby) as well as styles and accessories for little ones including bibs and onesies with neck ties or pearls, month by month onesies to capture your baby's first year, and hooded towels great for snuggling up a freshly cleaned baby or wrapping up a toddler after a fun day at the beach or in the pool.
I am so excited for this new season, even though it will be chalked full of stuff to accomplish. My prayer over the last few days has been for God to show me how to manage my time, how to structure my day so that I can spend quality time with Him and my family and still take care of our home, gather the needed adoption papers, and get a business up and running. I tell you, my days of vegging out in front of the TV are long gone. But it's all good. I wouldn't change a thing. He has answered my prayers and so far all systems are running smoothly.
So, will you help us in this? Will you join with Toby and me in prayer that God will guide our steps and give us wisdom and discernment as we walk the road that will take us to our son? Will you pray for protection over our baby and his birthmother? And will you help me get the word out about Bezi's Creations? I have started a FaceBook page and would love for you to "like" it and spread the word by sharing it with your friends. My products will be available for sale on the FaceBook page and also I will have my first sale this coming Saturday. I'm so excited to get things going! Thank you in advance for all of your support in this season. I know my Jesus has some amazing blessings lined up for so many in the coming months. It's going to be an awesome adventure!
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