Another week under our belt

Another week has come and gone and we're settling in a little more each day. Last week was full of activity. We met a friend at the park one day, attended a MOPS group and checked out the Exploreum. It seems that every day holds the inevitable trip to Wal-Mart, Lowe's or both, but luckily our lists seem to be getting shorter each day. Haley has been such a trooper, not that she's given much of a choice. Wednesday morning we met a friend and her little boy in Mobile for a morning at the park. The time to run, climb, swing and simply be outside was very refreshing for both Haley and me.
On Thursday morning we ventured out to a MOPS meeting. MOPS, Mothers of Preschoolers, is an international ministry that I was involved with in Tennessee, so when I saw it in the bulletin of the church we visited last Sunday, it caught my attention. The group at this church is fairly new, but they were very sweet and welcoming. Haley had fun playing and really liked checking in on the little babies, and I had an opportunity to meet moms that are in the same life stage as me. We had breakfast, an ice breaker, a speaker/video and a craft. I was really glad I went and will likely go back.

Friday morning we trekked off to the Exploreum. Not being much of a science enthusiast or having any children when we lived here before, I didn't pay much attention to it during our first tour in Mobile. After doing some research online, it looked like a fun place for Haley to play, explore and learn and boy was I right! The vast majority of the offerings there are way over her head, but there is a toddler area designed for children five and under that is awesome. It is blocked off, so she can run and play on her own without me worrying about her wandering off. In fact, we bought a membership so we can enjoy this great play time on hot or rainy days...both of which come around often in these parts. With our membership, we can even take other friends along with us!

By Friday afternoon I could tell that Haley was pooped, so we opted to stay home and play all afternoon. Well, I hadn't considered how difficult that would be for an extended period of time given we have no sofas, limited furnishings, and few toys. By the time Toby got home from work, I was about to bounce off the walls! Sadly, I was ecstatic to leave the two of them here while I headed to pick up a nutritious pizza dinner.

Over the weekend Toby had class, so Haley and I headed north. We spent Saturday with my mom buying fabrics for various projects around the house. All of which will be monumental in transforming this place into our home. My favorite is Haley's room...I can't wait to finish it and show you pictures. On Sunday I drove to Atlanta to meet a friend from Knoxville. We rendezvoused at Bethel Church on the south side of town. I love Bethel Church from Redding, CA and this church is a plant that was started up about three years ago. The worship experience was amazing and totally worth the drive! Frequently during worship, I heard prayers of praise and thanksgiving going up all around me...some in English, some in tongues, but all in beautiful harmony. Several times I opened my eyes to see this worship, but I never saw anyone in particular moving their mouth. It was incredible! This must be what the prayers of the nations sound like!

Anyway, our sweet neighbor in Tennessee had gathered some necessities from our home and sent them to Atlanta with my friend. I was so excited to unpack these boxes today...Haley's bath toys and Auburn shaker...not things I had asked for, but sweet thoughts to make the transition a little easier. When we left Knoxville three weeks ago, we thought we would only be camping in our vacant Mobile house for 10 days, and so we packed accordingly. Our schedule changed later and it will still be another four weeks before the moving van pulls up here in south Alabama. The neat thing is that God is teaching us (again) that stuff really is irrelevant and that we really can get by just fine on much less than we often demand. Thank you, Jesus, for that sweet reminder.

Operation Cookie Dropoff has already shown fruit! Months ago, long before we ever made the move, I was fearful of how I would establish roots here. God clearly assigned five houses on our street and told me to start there. Last week I made cookies and delivered them to three of these houses. At one house I missed the wife and woke up the night shift, sleeping at the time, husband, but today the wife knocked on my door! As I opened the door she stood there with a huge smile and a plant in her hand! She was returning our cookie plate and had gone out of her way to buy us a plant and a card!! She didn't come in, as her car was running, but we chatted for a few minutes before she headed off. After she left I read her card and it was the most thoughtful note that expressed how excited she and her family are about our being here and how anxious she is to get to know us. Sweet Jesus, you are planting seeds and developing relationships already! Thank you for this incredible reciprocity of kindness! Now, I just pray that opportunities will become available (or that we will be proactive to make them available) for this relationship to grow and develop and for You to be glorified in the process! Two more houses to go...

Operation Cookie Dropoff - Phases 2 & 3

First of all, thank you for being my accountability. Having said out loud (well, typing...you get the idea) what God has asked me to do, really helps to motivate me in following through with this assignment. As I was spending time with Jesus this afternoon I thought about this task. A few years ago, knocking on some stranger's door and attempting to build a relationship from scratch, with nothing in common but a property line...that would have been incredibly intimidating. So I was pondering today, why is this so much easier now? The answer was simple...this wasn't my idea. My Jesus asked me to do this. And because this is His assignment, I know that He will work all things for good. I don't need to worry about impressing anyone or wondering what they think of me. All I need to do is bake cookies, knock on doors, and share His love with the people He brings in my path. It is now His opinion that matters to me and He wants to use my hands and my tongue to love on the people who live on my street. Who am I to deny them that love from my sweet Jesus?
So anyway, I watched my next door neighbor's driveway throughout the day and a truck stayed in the drive all day, so I figured someone was home. After Haley's nap, she and I walked next door with our cookies. We waited on the porch for a bit and when the front door finally opened, it was clear that I had just woken up this poor man. He explained that he was working nights and had been asleep. I felt terrible, but he was incredibly gracious about it and even tried to make me feel better by saying he needed to get up anyway. I had met his wife and daughter in May when we were in town for interviews and doing repair work on the house. This family seems sweet and I hope we have another opportunity to meet up in the next few weeks.

As we were eating dinner, I saw our neighbors across the street working feverishly in the front yard for what seemed like several hours. I wanted to drop by while they were outside, but didn't make it on account of dinner time and Haley's bath. But I still forged ahead and made another batch of cookies anyway. By the time I made it over there, they had migrated to the back yard. This neighbor has her daughter and grandson living with her. They were very warm and friendly and invited me to join them in the backyard. I spent about an hour talking with them about the neighborhood and the city happenings. Again, I was amazed at how much people are willing to share when they just have a listening ear available. The grandson is a year older than Haley, so I hope there will be common ground to build on there while we love on that whole family.

I also learned from this neighbor that the man who owned our house before us had a grown son living with him with a drug problem (not the first time we've received this report) and said they "tore up that house." Well, she's right...when we bought this house there were huge holes in nearly every wall and door. Again, a few years ago that information would have scared me, don't ask me why, but it would have been unsettling. Now, I know that my Jesus has redeemed this property! He has great plans for this home and will use this property over the next few years for His glory! It is our prayer that He post angels on the four corners of this property to protect it and that all who enter our front door will physically feel His thick and sweet presence. We want no guest to leave unchanged. So we praise Jesus for the redemptive work that He has already done with this house and I can't wait to see how He redeems the lives of those around us. Pouring out His love to my neighbors and testifying to His goodness is a task I am excited to take on and I can't wait to watch Him work miracles. The one common thread I've noticed so far is that my neighbors are nice people, but they are missing out on the beautiful blessings God wants to lavish on their lives. Not necessarily financial gifts, but invaluable things such as true peace and everlasting joy. He is good, all the time and I am honored to be trusted with this assignment. On that note, I have two more houses to meet. We'll see how it goes!

Operation Cookie Dropoff - Phase 1

Of course I started with the one neighbor we had already spoken with, but I still did it! My sweet, elderly next door neighbor was so excited to have the company. After pulling her garbage can back up to her house, I put Haley down for a nap and took my monitor and plate of cookies next door.

She is divorced and has four grown children, lots of grandchildren and even more great-grandchildren. All but one live within a 10 mile radius of her house. One of her granddaughters and her son were there when I came to visit. As Jesus would have it, she is about my age and her son is one year older than Haley. They were so sweet and welcoming to me. I visited with them for a few minutes before she ran off to do other things and then had a chance to chat with my neighbor for awhile. I am always amazed at how easy most conversations are. I've learned that the trick is to keep asking them questions about themself...most people are really comfortable talking about themselves and will often volunteer much more than you asked for. On occasion, they will return the questions, but not usually. And that's okay too. My sweet Jesus has taught me over the years to simply be a good listener...pay attention to the details they share, remember names, don't interrupt and take interest in what they have to say. This is such an easy way for me to show love to someone...new and old friends alike. Everybody likes to know that someone is interested in their life.

So that's one down. God gave me five houses to start with. I saw another set of neighbors out on their porch this afternoon and another checking her mail as we were leaving the house. Instead of my usual smile and wave, I forced myself to cross the street, shake her hand and introduce myself. I think that was a good start. So now, I have four more plates of cookies to deliver...

Who have you loved on this week? I'd love to hear!

p.s. I know my comments function is having issues, so if you're having a problem leaving a comment on this blog, you can comment on Facebook or send me an email at soakinginlife@gmail.com. Also, if you would like to be added to my email list to receive a notice when a new post is published you can email me that request as well.

One week down

We have made it through our first week in Mobile and I have to say that God has done a huge work in my heart over the last seven days. We hadn't been in town 24 hours before reality hit and homesickness settled in. Thanks to all of you who prayed for my heart, it only took another 24 hours before my sweet Jesus started to change my perspective...

Toby's job seems to be getting better and better. Every day he came home with more great news...there is hunting property attached to the plant (he loves to hunt, but rarely gets to), his boss has encouraged him to take off as much time as we need to move our furniture, he is clearly valued and they are excited to have him, and on and on. In fact, we met with a contractor this week who said, "There's a long line of people wanting to work at that place. The fact that they hired you says a lot about you." I say, Nah, it says a lot about how amazing, generous, and powerful my Jesus is!

Toby's first night of class was Tuesday night and for the next six weeks he will study the Mission and Message of Jesus. Being a christian university, this is a required course for all UM students so most of his classmates are business, education or nursing students. He is the only student in this class from the theology department. When asked to share a brief introduction in class, most people responded that they're only there because they have to be. Toby shared our story in a nutshell..."I was an engineer in Tennessee and God called us into ministry, so I quit my job, moved to Mobile, started a new job yesterday and tonight is my first class." He said most of the room held blank stares of disbelief. Already God is giving us a platform to proclaim His goodness and share our journey! The professor is a pastor who teaches on the side and it quickly became clear that his interest is not in tests and papers, but in sharing the gospel with these students. His goal is to make sure each student that passes through that campus knows who Jesus is and what He taught. Toby was so excited and blown away by the teaching that his enthusiasm was contagious and instantly brought me out of my funk when he got home. His excitement helped me to refocus...to take my attention off of me and my pity party and to remember why we're here. We are here to love on the people of Mobile, to proclaim His goodness and love, and to learn as much as we possibly can!

Most of my week was spent gathering materials for the massive house project list. When we did the work on this house three years ago, we cut a lot of corners and put in the cheapest possible stuff we could in order to save a buck. Now that we're living here, there's a lot that has to be addressed...funky wiring with the light switches, leaky plumbing in the bathrooms, etc, etc. We have also decided to put in some extras to maximize space like a new closet system in the master bedroom, a new cabinet in the master bathroom and a larger sink in the kitchen. Haley was such a trooper as we trekked across town and made endless trips to Wal-Mart and Lowe's this week. Toby's dad has come into town to visit and help with some of these projects, and after an incredibly productive weekend, this little house is feeling more like home every day. My favorite project this week, has definitely been Haley's new big girl bed! A friend in Knoxville had this bed for his son and when he outgrew it he graciously passed it on to us. She loves it! She is doing so well with her new big girl bed and is so proud of herself. Her excitement and ability to adjust to all of these changes has made this transition that much easier.

As the week has progressed, I have been able to focus a little more clearly on the people of Mobile. Sweet Jesus has put so many smiling faces in my way...kind words from a lady at the laundromat, Jesus talk from a contractor, and friendly chat at the store. All are simple reminders of Jesus' love for me and evidence that He is the God who sees. He sees me going through each day and wants to remind me that He is here, making a path for me and pouring out His love.

He has impressed on us that the coming months are to be a season of learning. Not just Toby's learning from school, but for both of us to learn as much as possible about full time ministry. In doing so, it is our goal to visit as many churches as possible and experience as many worship styles and teaching as possible. With church planting impressed on our hearts, we want to gather the best aspects from the body of Christ. We do not want denominational traditions to stand in the way of learning from other parts of the body. That being said, we scoured the internet for churches to visit. Through a series of circumstances, we ended up at a new church this morning and square in the presence of the Lord. We had never set foot in this church before, but as soon as the music began the Spirit fell thick and heavy!! We saw a few people heading to the open area in the front of the room and as the lyrics grew, so did the number of people and their praises. I stared in amazement as grown men in suits jumped up and down with their hands raised as their extravagant praises overwhelmed them! It didn't take but a few seconds for the Spirit to capture my heart and take me away to a place of beautiful praise. Lost in His presence, I felt Toby wrap his arm around me..."look over there." When I opened my eyes and looked to the side of the auditorium, I saw flags flying...beautiful banners waved in glorious praise to our Jesus. At the front of the alter was another set of flags. You have to know that I had never seen (or heard of) banners and flags being used in worship until that life changing women's retreat in Feb 2009. That was one of the things that began my journey to entering His presence with physical praise. Seeing those flags this morning was a sweet, precious gift from my Jesus as He proclaimed to me..."I am here and I am doing beautiful things here in Mobile. Come, and be part of it!" This congregation was like none I had ever seen before. We saw old, white haired people, young punk-looking kids, African Americans, Asians, Hispanics, suits, tshirts, preppy dresses and pearls. We heard people speaking in tongues, freely shouting His praises, and dancing in His presence. The two hours we spent in that place this morning is something I will treasure always. While we're not looking for a church home to plug into right now, that was a wonderful start to give us hope that Jesus beat us to Mobile in bringing glorious life to this city! I can't wait to see how we will fit into His revival here!

So what now? How do we start making new friends, sharing our story and our Jesus, and establishing a routine? The church we visited today just so happens to have a MOPS group (mothers of preschoolers). Because I was on the leadership team for this ministry at our church in Tennessee, this immediately caught my attention. Their first meeting of the year is this week and I am planning to attend. Also, many months ago God gave me five neighbors, houses all visible from my front door. He has told me to start there. We met the first neighbor two days ago...a sweet, retired grandmother who has lived here for years, but never met any other neighbors. This is confirmation that it will be our job to bring these people together. To build relationships right here on our street and pour out Jesus' love in any way we can. We'll start by delivering a plate of cookies and a smile and just wait to see where Jesus takes us from there...

It would be easy for me to get lost in my endless to do list and projects around the house...Satan would love for me to do that...to keep to myself and keep silent. But I know that God brought us here with a message...a message of love and hope that this city is in desperate need of hearing. The coming weeks will require huge steps for me to come out of my comfort zone and step into the awesome power of Jesus. To boldly knock on the front door of a stranger and share Jesus' love. It just so happens that I ran across this quote this morning...

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God! Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others." -Marianne Williamson

So my challenge to you...and me...is to step out and let your light shine! If you are a child of the Most High God, who can stand against you?!? If you are not sure where to start or what to say, simply reflect on what you have experienced and what God has taught you. Nobody can take away your experiences. Proclaim the love and mercy you have experienced with confidence! As you take those steps of faith, know that I will be doing the same this week. I can't wait to share with you how it goes and I'd love to hear your story, too! Please feel free to leave a comment or email me with your experiences...So that they will know that HE is God!

Official Mobile residents

Well, it's official. We're Mobile residents...again. After a much needed week of rest and time with our families, we drove into town on Sunday afternoon. Monday was a day of busy beavers...we had new carpet installed, the internet connected, and the gas turned on. While all of that was going on Haley was playing with a friend and I started scrubbing. You know, 1100 sq ft may not seem like much until you scrub it Cinderella style. That's right, Toby and I scrubbed two years of gunk from the floor on our hands and knees until 11pm last night. But man, what a difference that made. We can now walk around barefoot in this house for the first time in three years! That alone makes this place feel a little more like home.

Since we had new carpet and hot water, we opted to spend the night at our new house last night. Our furniture will not arrive until the end of September, so we're "roughin it" in the meantime with air mattresses, a mini fridge and card table. I praise God that Haley hasn't missed a beat. Although she's been a bit more clingy than usual, she thinks this adventure is great...always talking about "goin' to the new house" and running through the empty place like it's her playground. She even slept in a big girl bed for the first time this afternoon. We figured while we're forcing her into this huge transition of a new house, we might as well make it a little bigger and take away her crib. So far it's going great...ask me in a few days if I'm still excited about it. :)

Our first night here was much more emotional for me than I expected. It all started when I went to Wal-Mart for a few last minute items while Toby brought Haley home. As I stood in the forever long line I looked around at the familiar store. I know that a Wal-Mart is a Wal-Mart, but I've learned lately...not so much. The Wal-Mart in fancy Farragut, TN was always well lit, clean, organized and fully stocked. The other shoppers and cashiers exchanged an easy smile and friendly greeting. Despite the usual chaos of any Wal-Mart, that shopping trip was almost always pleasant. The Wal-Mart here in Saraland was very unorganized and many of the shelves sat empty or roughly rummaged. It was rare to make eye contact with anyone, much less see a smile. At 8pm the atmosphere was chaotic with people yelling (not in anger, just a normal tone of conversation) at other members of their party or their children with lines stretched far into the open space. Now, I have never considered myself a "shopping snob" and have been proud to shop wherever I need to, regardless of the environment, but last night was a totally different experience. It was so overwhelmingly obvious that Satan has a hold on this city. Not just Saraland, but the whole county. Generally speaking, people are just more bitter here, and it's stifling. I know that this is one of the many reasons God has brought us back here. To be a bright and shining light for Jesus in this place. To spread His love like wildfire and watch Him melt hearts of stone. I can't wait for the adventure to unfold.

I can look at this objectively now, but on my way home last night, all I could think of was "I want to go home." Home to where we were surrounded by tons of godly people who loved us dearly. Home to where we had our routine and our church. Home to where we had a big, spacious, beautiful house. Even though we've been here before, this place we're living now is not home...not yet. I know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that God has brought us here. And I know that He will make it okay.

Even in this state of homesickness, He has already given me some beautiful gifts...divine appointments to remind me of His love for me. Toby always worries about me when we have people come to the house to do work when he's not here, so naturally yesterday's events were unnerving for him. However, the carpet guys, the crew that was here most of the day, turned out to be a sweet Jesus gift. The two guys were 18 and 23, have laid carpet with their dad as long as they can remember, and were the nicest guys. In fact, they moved here from Athens, TN (not far from where we were) about five years ago because their daddy is a preacher and took on a pastorship not far from here. Coincidence? I think not. Another sweet moment...I went to campus this morning to get Toby's textbook for his class, and because traditional classes do not start until next week, the campus was a ghost town. While I was wandering around campus, looking for his classroom, I started chatting with the lone soul around. After a minute or two we made the connection that he's Toby's teacher! He gave me a copy of the syllabus, invited me to join the lectures any time, and even walked me to the bookstore and handed me the textbook I was looking for. Again...what are the odds that the one person I'd chat with on a vacant campus would be Toby's professor? My Jesus doesn't do coincidences...He set those people in my path to remind me that even though we've "made the big move" He's still here with me, walking me through every step of every day. He's not going to bring us this far and then walk away...that's simply not how He works.

So when the lonely days come and the homesick days seem unbearable, I will choose to remember that He will make all things good. He told me a few months ago..."you can't even imagine the amazing things I have planned for you." I'm clinging to that promise, and will remember that not too long ago we were new to Tennessee with no friends, no church and no routine and just look at how He blessed us then. I know He'll do it here as we start again...

A restless night and sweet encounter with Jesus

We are taking a week to vacation with our families on our way south to Mobile. Tonight is night number 2. Toby's mom is with us and usually I sleep like a baby when she's around because she always gets up with Haley. Tonight however, after going to bed after midnight, I was wide awake at 4am. I've had this nasty cough for a few weeks now, and it has often woken me up, but normally I return to sleep pretty easily. Tonight, as I laid there in the dark, I did everything I could to drift back to dream land...sing songs, recall scripture, think about the last few days...all things that usually send me off in seconds. When nothing worked, I decided to talk to Jesus...well, beg Jesus to help me fall asleep. Then it occurred to me that I had failed to make time for just He and I over the last several days. Granted, the world would say, "You've been busy with the move, and packing, and family...that's understandable." But I know that this distance is why I'm awake now. My Jesus adores me, and He missed me and couldn't wait any longer to tell me what was on His heart.

I told Him, "Please let me go back to sleep and I'll meet with you first thing in the morning, I promise." Then I thought about our arrangements...while we don't have anything planned for tomorrow (Sunday), it's not likely that I will slip away from the excitement and activity of our family. The houseboat where we're staying is fairly small and it's too miserably hot to spend much time outside without the moving air of the pontoon boat or jet ski. So I had to be honest with Jesus and myself, that's not true...you won't make the time. So now what? Maybe You want me to read something now? But what? As you read this post, you need to know that my knowledge of the Bible is very limited, and recalling exact references of scripture is very difficult for me. If it's something I've studied before, I can likely get you to the right book, but it's going to take me a while to find a specific scripture. So I start thinking...what am I suppose to read? I have been spending a lot of time in the Psalms lately, so maybe I'm suppose to read the next chapter? No, that didn't feel right. So I asked, what do You want me to read? Immediately I heard, "40." Psalm 40? I had read it the week before last, but couldn't remember what it said. So I got to thinking, I have my iPhone laying right here, I could just pull it up and not disturb anybody. Truth be told, I really, really didn't want to get out of the bed. As I reached for my phone, I thought, was that Psalm 40 or 140? "Both." Okie dokie...I'm wide awake anyway so here we go...

Psalm 40 - God sustains His servant.
I waited patiently for the Lord; and He inclined to me and heard my cry. (v.1)
Holy smokes!!! That's exactly where I am!!! I feel like I cried out to Him about this move for nearly six months, out of frustration and fear of the unknown, and on this side of it I know that not only did He hear me, but He answered my cries in huge ways...bigger than I could have imagined. Maybe I'm on the right track with reading...I didn't just make this up...

He brought me up out of the pit of destruction, out of the miry clay, and He set my feet upon a rock making my footsteps firm. (v.2)
One beautiful prophesy spoken over us at the very beginning of this journey was that God had already laid our path. All we had to do was walk it out. He had gone before us and prepared the way. Later Jesus elaborated...there would be twists and turns in the path, but it will all be good, keep my eyes focused only on Him and do not get distracted by what is happening off to the side, stay right with Jesus. Yes, Jesus, you have made our footsteps firm. You have guided us through every twist, turn and decision that came our way.

He put a new song in my mouth, a song of praise to our God; Many will see and fear and will trust in the Lord. (v.3)
My Boothmakers bible study group has a tradition of prayer over the birthday girl and blessing her with scripture on her birthday. My birthday was just two weeks ago and one dear friend gave me two women - Hannah (1 Sam 2:1-2) and Mary (Luke 1:46,47,49) and described me as a cheerleader for Jesus. She said that my heart and testimony would come forth in glorious praise just as these women lavished the Lord with their praises.

During our last week in Knoxville, several of our friends took time to pray over us and release prophesy over us as we enter this new season. Last Monday night, it was said of me that I have the spirit of Mary, a spirit of praise. One friend told me later that as soon as that word was spoken, he felt the Spirit fall thick and heavy in confirmation. Oh Jesus, what an honor to be compared to these amazing women!

Yes, Jesus...You have given me a new song. No longer do I desire to follow the rules of box checking religion, but I want to know You and spend as much time as possible lost in Your presence. It is a new song indeed! My prayer is that others will long to know You in this way and come to an intimate, safe and loving relationship with You...I know now what they're missing. It is sweeter and higher and better than anything this world has to offer!

How blessed is the man who has made the Lord his trust, And has not turned to the proud, nor to those who lapse into falsehood. (v.4)
My prayer from the beginning of this journey has been to step right where He says step and when He says step. I don't want to be one inch outside of His plan for me. In this approach my mantra quickly became, "I will trust You." It was often an act of the will. Following His ways didn't come naturally, but I intentionally chose to trust what He told me. For example, the world would have pushed us to take that first, low ball, offer on our house, two weeks after we listed it...but that's not what He had planned. He specifically gave us the list price and waited to see if we would take the easy guarantee or hold out for His promise. At the end of this season, I'm glad we held out. Yes, Jesus you have blessed our willful act of trust in You!

Many, O Lord my God, are the wonders which You have done, and Your thoughts toward us; There is none to compare with You. If I would declare and speak of them, They would be too numerous to count. (v.5)
Jesus has brought me to this verse numerous times in the last few weeks as the details of this job and relocation have unfolded. Many, many amazing wonders He has done in answering our prayers. He provided income, relocation, and tuition money above and beyond my wildest dreams! He is that good and He loves to lavish His blessings on me. Jesus, help me to always keep open eyes and open arms for Your blessings. Even though I can't count them, I don't want to miss a single one!

Your thoughts toward us? Do you, the busy God of the universe, really think about me? Oh yes, the fact that I am writing this at 5:30am is proof that You think about me. Those who know me personally know that I adore my sleep and there is little that can pry me from it, but tonight my Jesus was thinking of me and like a vortex, I couldn't resist but spend time with Him.

Sacrifice and meal offering You have not desired; My ears You have opened; burnt offering and sin offering You have not required. (v.6)
Over the last 18 months Jesus has taught me that He's not interested in my box checking...going to church on Sunday, doing good for the sake of 'doing good', or even leading a small group or reading my Bible if it's done out of obligation. Not only does He not want me to go through the motions for the sake of religion, but that behavior disgusts Him (Rev 3:15-16). What He wants is for me to give Him a chance...get to know Him, read about Him, talk to Him. He made me because He loves to spend time with me. That's what He wants from me...He wants me to love Him and allow me to let Him love me back.

Then I said, "Behold, I come; in the scroll of the book it is written of me. I delight to do Your will, O my God; your Law is within my heart." (v.7-8)
When I read this chapter a few weeks ago, Jesus pressed me to memorize verse 8. In fact, I wrote it on my hand as a reminder and a memory jogger throughout the day. Yes, Jesus...I want to write Your words on my heart and doing Your will brings such joy and peace to my heart because You have shown me, time and time again, that Your will is better than any shabby dream I can come up with on my own.

I have proclaimed glad tidings of righteousness in the great congregation; Behold, I will not restrain my lips, O Lord, You know. I have not hidden Your righteousness within my heart; I have spoken of Your faithfulness and Your salvation; I have not concealed Your lovingkindness and Your truth from the great congregation. (v.9-10)
Growing up, I was always taught not to 'hide my light under a basket'...remember that song? Once I got older, that message was translated into, "You're suppose to tell everybody about Jesus." Well, I didn't have much to tell, but because it's what you are 'suppose to do' I went along. So I forced myself to share what I knew...don't drink underage, be modest in your dress, don't mess around with boys, be at church on Sunday morning, and read your Bible every day. After all, these were the things good Christians did, right?

Over the last 18 months, the Holy Spirit has come alive in me and has transformed me from the inside out. All of those "don't dos" were not sacrifices anymore, or sheer acts of will, I simply didn't desire to do those things. With every encounter with Jesus, I wanted more. And more of Him often brought with it a transformation of my mind and my thinking. Now that I see life this way, I can't keep quiet!! Jesus is not the great hall monitor...He is beautiful and sweet and He wants desperately to love on me and pour our His blessings on my life and others. Now that's worth talking about!!

You, O Lord, will not withhold Your compassion from me; Your lovingkindness and Your truth will continually preserve me. (v.11)
My only fear now in moving to Mobile is being 'on my own.' For 18 months I have been like a baby, soaking up every ounce of Jesus stories I could get from my Boothmakers and others Jesus put in our path. My Boothmakers are a little farther along in their love affair with Jesus, and I can't get enough of their stories and wisdom. They are encouragement to me and I'm afraid I'll loose some of my passion and excitement if they're not there to spur me on. This verse is the answer to my fear...You will go with me to Mobile. You will show me compassion, lovingkindness and truth. While I will miss my Boothmakers desperately, My Jesus is all I really need.

For evils beyond number have surrounded me; my iniquities have overtaken me, so that I am not able to see; they are more numerous than the hairs of my head, and my heart has failed me. Be pleased, O Lord, to deliver me; Make haste, O Lord, to help me. Let those be ashamed and humiliated together who seek my life to destroy it; let those be turned back and dishonored who delight in my hurt. Let those be appalled because of their shame who say to me, "Aha, aha!" (v.12-15)
On two recent occasions, our last Sunday at our Knoxville church and in prophetic prayer last week, we were warned that we will be attacked. Satan hates nothing more than obedience to the Lord and praise of His goodness. We have done both, making us targets. In the last few days, we've already seen these attacks forming...little things, nothing detrimental, but they are coming all the same. On Tuesday I discovered that fraudulent charges had been made on our credit card and just now, even as I began to type this scripture, Haley woke up with a bad dream. The credit card issue was resolved quickly and painlessly and Haley is now calmly cuddling with MiMi. Because these first attacks have been minor, I know that we have a shield of protection around us as we begin this new season. We have had countless people tell us that they will be praying for us in the coming weeks and months as we transition into this new life and I firmly believe it is those prayers that have kept Satan's attacks at bay.

Let all who seek You rejoice and be glad in You; let those who love Your salvation say continually, "The Lord be magnified!" (v.16)
This is the purpose of this blog...to testify to all that God has done, all that He has taught us, and how great His love is for us. I hope you have found our journey to be encouraging. While I never set out to write this blog to receive praise from men, I am simply being obedient to what God tells me to share, I have already seen how He is using our experiences to bless others. This blog has only been up and running for just under three weeks. As of last night, it was approaching 1,000 hits. That is not something I can take credit for. I could not have spread the word that far if I had tried. Those hits are simply confirmation that these are His words for you...He has something He wants to tell you in these posts, so I pray that you will continually return to read about His extravagant love for you! Yes, Jesus...be magnified!!!

Since I am afflicted and needy, let the Lord be mindful of me. You are my help and my deliverer; do not delay, O my God. (v.17)
As a mere human living on this earth, I will always be needy. My vision and understanding are so limited in comparison to my Lord. The good news is that He adores me and longs to lead me through this life and help me to make the most of my time here on earth. Jesus, help me to always see myself as needy of You!

Psalm 140 - Prayer for Protection against the Wicked
Rescue me, O Lord, from evil men; preserve me from violent men who devise evil things in their hearts; they continually stir up wars. They sharpen their tongues as a serpent; poison of a viper is under their lips. Selah. Keep me, O Lord, from the hands of the wicked; preserve me from violent men who have purposed to trip up my feet. The proud have hidden a trap for me, and cords; they have spread out a net by the wayside; they have set snares for me. Selah. I said to the Lord, "You are my God; give ear, O Lord, to the voice of my supplications. O God the Lord, the strength of my salvation, you have covered my head in the day of battle. "Do not grant, O Lord, the desires of the wicked; do not promote his evil device, that they not be exalted. Selah. As for the head of those who surround me, may the mischief of their lips cover them. May burning coals fall upon them; may they be cast into the fire, into deep pits from which they cannot rise. May a slanderer not be established in the earth; may evil hunt the violent man speedily." (v.1-11)
Like I mentioned before, we are heading into this new season fully aware of the target on our backs. Satan is ready to come after us, to discourage us, to silence us, to cause us to doubt and to strike fear in us. Another prophesy spoken over us last week (Toby specifically) was to guard ourselves in Mobile. As Jesus taught us not to throw our pearls to swine (Matt 7:6) we are to be careful who we cling to for spiritual support. Newsflash...Satan is sneaky. It is totally within his character and history to put someone in our path that looks to be an encouragement, but will actually be destructive (Matt 7:15). Jesus, please open our eyes to those who seek to destroy us and the mission You have called us to. Protect our home from Satan's attacks and help us to stay on the offensive against him. Let our victories over him become great testimony to Your power and sovereignty!

I know that the Lord will maintain the cause of the afflicted and justice for the poor. Surely the righteousness will give thanks to Your name; the upright will dwell in Your presence. (v.12-13)
Another lesson I've learned in the last six months is that God will never ask me to do something and not provide the tools I need to do it. In the same way that Jesus has provided for our physical and financial needs in abundant measures, He will provide our spiritual needs. He will give us the tools we will need to fight off Satan's attacks. He will give us scripture, He will give us boldness and courage, He will give us prayer warriors to support us, and if need be, He will send His valiant angels to protect us. He has set this path into motion...our moving to Mobile was His idea, not ours, and if we are faithful to follow His leading and trust in Him, nothing will stand in the way of the fulfillment of this assignment!

My prayer for our little house is that it would be a dwelling place for the Holy Spirit. I pray that people will physically feel the Spirit's presence as they walk through our front door, and that we will so generously pour out Jesus' love that our visitors will not leave our home the same. Jesus, we give you the flip house and its property, come and dwell there, use it for Your glory to draw others to You, and please send your angels to protect the four corners of the property as Satan begins his attacks on our assignment.

I know this post was incredibly long, but I was not able to rest until I shared it with you. I am so blessed by these words from Jesus straight to my heart. It is true that He knows me so well and He knows exactly what I need to hear and when I need to hear it. If you have similar encounters with Jesus and His extravagant love, please share them...with everyone you come in contact with. Let it be written all over your face and demeanor. And if you get a chance, I'd love to hear them sometime, too. You can post a comment or send me an email at soakinginlife@gmail.com. I am always encouraged by other people's Jesus stories. Thanks for hanging in there through this post, I hope it was worth it!

Bittersweet Goodbyes

When we got word that Toby's company wanted to move us to Knoxville, my only reservation was meeting people. Haley was five weeks old and we had planned for me to stay home with her, so my career was inconsequential. My fear was being a new stay at home mom in a new city...how would I meet people? I feared I would be isolated with no outlet to make friends. Like I shared before, one of the things God has taught me is that He doesn't do anything half way. In less than two years, He blessed Toby and me with so many more friends than we could have ever expected. Almost all of our lasting friendships were birthed out of our involvement with our church. Toby got involved with the youth group and led a guys small group, I was asked to be on the leadership team of a mom's ministry, we both led a young families small group and of course, there were my precious Boothmakers.

We knew that leaving Tennessee would be hard. In fact, left on our own we would have never moved back to Mobile. We enjoyed our time there, but Knoxville was totally different. The seasons, weather and landscape are incomparable. The culture is so inviting. Generally speaking, the people are warm, kind and friendly. We were proactive in seeking out relationships and God blessed us with tons of friends...people who we will always be connected to...either in this life or the next.

When we moved to Knoxville, saying goodbye to our friends in Mobile was fairly surreal. I cried a little, but for the most part I was so excited about the move that I kind of glided past that part. It wasn't until I sat in our apartment in Tennessee for the first time and looked around did I realize we had actually moved to a different state. Having only lived in Alabama (granted, all over Alabama but always within the state borders), residing in another state with no family anywhere around was a shock to my system. So when it came time to say goodbye to our new Tennessee friends I expected the transition to be the same. Granted, I'm sure I will still have moments of shock and adjustment once we move into the little house, the goodbyes were much harder than I thought they would be. When I take stock of the last two years, I am amazed at the bonds Jesus formed. Not only was I terribly sad to leave the people who had been so instrumental in transforming my life, I was shocked and humbled to see them sad to see us leave. I knew we were great friends, but to see our departure truly effect others was surprising to me. Jesus has been so sweet to give us these relationships and I know they will continue on because what binds us together is not a job, or a neighborhood, or a common interest...it's Jesus, the creator of the universe. With Him as our center, these bonds will last an eternity.

As we drove across the state line yesterday, I searched for the "Welcome to Alabama the Beautiful" sign. Having always been an Alabama resident, this sign posted at every state border was always comforting to see when we traveled. I have lived all over Alabama...Birmingham, Huntsville, Mobile, Montgomery, and Auburn...this state has always been home. While we truly loved every minute of living in Tennessee, an indescribable peace came over me as I saw my sign...Welcome Home! It was the latest in a long list of confirmations from Jesus, that we are indeed on the right path. We're not making this up, or blowing some crazy dream out of proportion...Jesus has called us home.

And yes, I was driving when I took this picture. Don't worry...Toby has already fussed at me about it! (But for the record, I think it turned out pretty good for going 70 mph.)

His ways are not my ways

June 2009...A company in Pensacola had received Toby's resume and was anxious to interview him. While we were excited about the possibility of an engineering job, we were reluctant to walk away from the pastor internship. After all, God told Toby to work in a church and that's a "church job"...right?

After Toby's interview with the executive pastor we left excited about the position...on paper. We had a few questions regarding the job, but were unable to make contact with this pastor for nearly a month. We weren't able to put our finger on it, but there was just something not quite right about that job. We never got a peace that this was what we were suppose to do. So we waited, some more...

In my gut, I felt guilty about entertaining the idea of an engineering job. It would certainly mean more money than a minimum wage internship, and I couldn't get past that. Somewhere in my churchy upbringing, I equated serving the Lord with poverty. While I firmly believe that God will meet our needs and He will never call me to something and not provide what I need, it took me a while to see past this. One day while I was spending time with Jesus, I asked Him about the engineering job and related salary. Because He knows me so well, there was no need to explain my guilt or thought process...He already knew all that. He simply told me, "Accept this gift." Huh? What gift? There had been no other job offer or even interviews for that fact. What gift are you talking about? "For every beast of the forest is Mine, the cattle on a thousand hills...For the world is Mine, and all it contains." Psalm 50:10,12

We were not thrilled about a two hour commute, but we still headed to Pensacola to entertain an interview. After months of waiting, it was the only other option we had out there. On Wednesday, the day before we left for Pensacola, Toby received a call from his recruiter with great news...there was a company in Mobile that wanted to interview him as well. By lunchtime, he had completed an hour long phone interview with the company...wow, that was fast! That evening we had dinner with our pastor and his wife. They are the most humble and loving people, and we are so grateful for their hospitality, friendship and leadership. Knowing that they had been in the ministry for several decades, we were anxious for their counsel on the predicament we found ourselves in. After five months of waiting and unknowns, we now had a church internship offer on the table, an engineering interview pending, and interest from another company. When Toby shared the details of the internship, our uneasiness about it, and God's command to "work in a church," our pastor frankly replied, "Oh yeah, I've got tons of those things I haven't done yet. Just because He tells you to do something, doesn't mean He wants you to do it right now. The timing needs to be right." As we heard those words, a clear understanding and a peace came over both of us. Just because there was a church job out there, doesn't necessarily mean this is the time to take it. It is okay to walk away from it. This understanding was so freeing. This council coupled with God's words to me about some "gift" gave us the assurance to pursue the engineering jobs with confidence. Working in a church would come in a later season.

On Thursday morning we headed south, destined for Pensacola. Within an hour into our trip, we received another call from the recruiter. The Mobile company was so impressed with Toby's phone interview that they wanted him to come in for a plant interview...on Monday. After five months of nothing, this company was moving at lightning speeds! Toby interviewed in Pensacola on Friday and they were clearly impressed with his knowledge and experience. Despite their excitement to hire him, they had three positions open and Toby was the first to interview...it would be at least three weeks before we heard anything.

On Monday morning, Toby headed to the Mobile company for an interview. We had made the trip from our little house to the Mobile plant. The Mobile job would require a 25 minute commute...a huge plus in comparison to Pensacola's hour + commute. Toby really liked the work environment and company organization and they seemed to be equally impressed with him. He finished his interview and we left Mobile around 11:30 Monday morning, heading for Knoxville. Within an hour, we received another call...the Mobile company wanted Toby back on Friday for another interview. What?!? Our heads were spinning at the speed this company was moving. The recruiter relayed that this company loved Toby and this next interview was to simply "seal the deal" and "convince him that this was where he should work." Given this information and the close proximity to our house, we knew that this is where we were suppose to be...the coming days and weeks would simply be formality.

To make a long story short (well, shorter...I know it's still long) Toby interviewed again that Friday and was utterly convinced this is where he was suppose to work. The people were wonderful, he had great chemistry with his would-be coworkers, and we had heard wonderful things about this company. The next Friday we received a job offer and after praying over the weekend, we accepted it on Monday. The offer included less hours than he was currently working and "full relocation." It wasn't until a few days later when we received the relocation packet did we fully understand what a gift this was. "Full relocation" includes: movers to pack, move and unpack our belongings, temporary housing in Mobile, payment of closing costs associated with the sale of our TN house, and if the house didn't sell within a given time period, the company would purchase it from us. I sat back in utter amazement. Now, I understood what "gift" Jesus was talking about.

In one fell swoop He tackled every single mountain we faced...income in Mobile, selling the TN house, and health insurance. He even put us in the financial position for me to continue to stay home with Haley and have more children...the greatest desire of my heart! The only thing left was tuition money. Because we knew we would get the equity out of our TN house soon, we were thrilled to be able to use that for Toby's tuition. Isn't that amazing?!?

But wait...it gets better. Our God is a God of abundance! I had just pulled into the Wal-Mart parking lot when Toby called me after his first conversation with our relocation specialist. It turns out that instead of putting us up in temporary housing in the new location, this company's policy is to pay the employee a lump sum and allow them to make their own housing arrangements. Well, it just so happens that we already have a house in Mobile, and since we're more than happy to camp out on blow up mattresses for a few weeks, we can keep the funds and use them at our discretion. In addition, the employee is paid another lump sum for miscellaneous moving expenses. When we did the math and added these two payments with a generous gift from some TN friends, God had handed us, in cash, the funds to cover Toby's tuition. And not just a semester or two...his entire degree! We were perfectly willing, and excited to use the equity in our house to cover this, but sweet Jesus went above and beyond, and slathered some icing on top! I was literally speechless at this news. This came out of left field and caught me completely off guard.

One of the thousand lessons we've learned over the last six months is that God doesn't do anything half way or 'good enough.' When we get out of the way, take our hands out of the pot and wait for His timing, He will do AMAZING things! Things that are so incredible that only He can take the credit! At the beginning of this journey, we would have never expected, or even asked for the indescribable gifts we would end up with.

Through this entire process, Toby and I were committed to the highest level of integrity. Toby informed his company of our detour in March, knowing full well they may escort him out that day and we would be left with two mortgages and no income. The Lord granted him favor and they offered for him to stay employed for as long as he needed. When Toby interviewed for jobs in Mobile and Pensacola, he always shared our calling and plans for school and ministry. This could have cost us a job opportunity, revealing that he would likely pursue other career paths in the future. But these were the facts and we felt to not be upfront and honest would be deceptive and this was not the image we wanted to portray of our Jesus. I truly feel that God honored this integrity through this process (Ps 25:21; Ps 26:1, 11).

"'For my thoughts are not your thoughts, Nor are your ways My ways,' declares the Lord." Isaiah 55:8
The climax of this journey is no where near where I thought it would be. Left on our own, we would have likely taken that first offer on our house, walked away with far less equity and possibly missed this incredible job offer.

"And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose." Romans 8:28
Remember when that neighboring house sold? I was so angry and confused, because ours was priced lower! Jesus asked me then, "Do you trust me?" I know now that if this new company buys our house, it will be based on appraisals...and what factors into appraisal values? That's right...recent home sales. While I saw that house selling as failure of God to provide, He was working all things for my good!

"Your Father sees what is done in secret and will reward you." Matthew 6:4
Remember our realtor who obediently stepped out and offered to list our house without earning a commission? After five months of sitting on the market, under this new arrangement she will receive a commission when this house sells! Don't you see? Our obedience is not just for my benefit...He is abundant in His blessings.

"If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give what is good to those who ask Him!" Matthew 7:11
The blessings and lessons He gave us over this season are beyond measure. Most importantly we learned how to hear His voice more clearly and wait for Him. The take away - hold on for His timing! Even when it doesn't seem like things make sense or He has forgotten about your despair...He has not forgotten...He's simply working in His ways and His timing. His way will always be worth the wait!

Blessings during the waiting

While we waited...and waited, sweet Jesus provided us manna and helped us to feel like we were making forward progress. It seems each week He would give me one task to focus one. One week it would be submitting registration materials for Toby's school, or making contacts about refinancing the little house, or researching local deals in Mobile. Sweet Jesus knows me so well. If He had given me one huge to-do list, I would have panicked.

The biggest assignment He gave us was our yard sale. As part of releasing our security in "stuff" lots of things had to go. Nothing detrimental, but clutter, excess, things we really didn't need and could live without. This project took on a life of its own. Each week I would focus on a different closet or room to clean out. This was my purging time to go through all kinds of junk we'd been moving from city to city. I also began to accumulate a huge pile of stuff that was "yard sale worthy." Not knowing where the funds for our moving expenses or Toby's tuition were going to come from, we sold all kinds of mess in hopes of earning what we needed.

One of my friends knew we were working toward having this sale and brought up a proposition..."We have a bunch of stuff in a storage unit. Will you sell it in your yard sale and you can just keep the money?" Uh, sure...I'll take your junk off your hands...we can use as much help as we can get. When Toby and I showed up at their house to pick up the "junk" I was floored at what was waiting for us...two beds, a slot machine, a curio cabinet, a TV, a chest of drawers, a bookshelf, a bedspread and linens, curtains, a bicycle, a mountain of precious moments figurines, tons of books, and on and on. This pile was not junk. It was very functional and valuable. When we asked why they didn't sell the stuff themselves, the answer was humble, "God told us a long time ago that this stuff was suppose to go to somebody who needed it." We were completely blown away at this gift.

Instead of waiting for the yard sale, we decided to list the big stuff on Craigslist. That alone turned into a full time job, but I welcomed the distraction and somewhere to put my energy. I set up a little photo studio in my garage, posted all the items, managed tons of emails coming in, and met buyers all over town. As a stay at home mom, it felt good to be able to put forth energy to earn money for our family and this calling.

Our best friends from Mobile made the eight hour drive to Knoxville to help us with the yard sale. She is as organized as me, so we worked well together all day on Friday getting ready for the big day. We were up and moving at 4:30AM (a sacrifice in itself) to set up for the early birds, and they showed up on the scene at 6AM on the nose! From that point on, people constantly flowed through our sale and were still coming at 2PM when we started to shut it down. At the end of the day, combined with our Craigslist sales, we had earned over $2,500! God is so good! This would easily pay for a U-Haul and Toby's first semester of tuition! God's mercy and abundance showed up in a huge way that day.



Please do not think that every moment of every day was filled with joy and excitement and hope for a beautiful journey. I think I can say honestly, that most of our journey has been that way, but I certainly had my weak moments. I can't count how many times I found myself in a puddle on the floor weeping for Jesus to just give me the answers! Often these times came when I was alone, but Toby saw a handful of them. Often he was wonderful to simply sit with me and let me cry. He knew he didn't have the answers I wanted. I wanted to know how all of this would end. I wanted to know that everything was going to be okay, we would be able to pay our bills, and have more babies. I wanted to visualize what life might look like six months down the road. At this point, I had no idea other than we would be living in our little flip house. I didn't know where, or if, Toby would be working. I didn't know if I would have to go back to work or what would happen with Haley during the day. And most heartbreaking of all, I didn't know if we would be in a financial position to have any more children soon. My heart has always desired to have a big family and my dream has always been for them to be two years or so apart...Haley was now 20 months and pregnancy was nowhere in sight.

During these moments of helplessness, Jesus often gave me songs to meditate on. I called them my theme songs. I would play them over and over and over as I laid on the floor and stared into space. No matter how helpless I felt, I always walked away from those moments with a few more breadcrumbs to cling to. Jesus always met me there, and like Toby, just let me cry...He never gave me the answers I wanted, but He knew I was sad and wanted nothing more than to comfort me and reassure me that everything would in fact be okay...if for no other reason than He is going with us to Mobile. I have come to understand that His presence is truly all I need. I don't need a big income, or even more children...I just need Him.

Here are some of my "theme songs"
Rita Springer, "Worth it all"
John Waller, "While I'm waiting"
Anthony Skinner, "I will be alright"